Page 66 of Lucien

“Yes, I do,” Jay answered seriously before turning back and poking his finger at yet another cactus.

Hidden depths indeed.

sixteen

Lucien

Luceyedhisoldfriend in the strained silence that followed the trio’s departure.

Roman looked objectively good, Luc supposed he had to admit. That harried, frantic air he’d had all those years Luc had been chasing him had finally gone away.

In truth, he was an absurdly handsome man, which was incredibly annoying when Luc was angry with him. Which was generally always.

Luc wondered, not for the first time, why he’d never been compelled to start a more intimate relationship with his old friend. But his monster had never wanted that from Roman, and neither had Luc. He and it hadn’t been looking for prey or a potential lover on that battlefield. They had been looking for…companionship. Family.

And Luc had certainly fucked all that up, hadn’t he?

“I’m surprised you let Danny leave your sight, here in enemy territory, mon ami.” Luc wasn’t sure why he tacked on those last words. Something of a habit, perhaps, coupled with the inability to keep himself from taunting his former friend with the old moniker, one that had once been sincere and had long since become mocking.

Roman brushed absently at the arm of his chair as if dispelling dust, frowning at it. “He can hold his own these days.”

Luc was frankly surprised his own monster had allowed Jamie out with two potentially hostile vampires. But his monster knew—it could sense, in that way it had—that Danny was…good, for lack of a better word. He wouldn’t hurt their mate, not out of simple spite against Luc.

And there were Jay’s earlier words on their purpose here:part reconnaissance, part rescue mission.

No, Danny definitely wouldn’t hurt Jamie. He would protect him—a human, an innocent—even if that protection was from Luc himself.

There was comfort in that.

There were a million questions Luc could ask Roman. A million apologies he could and should be making. But he found himself asking instead the one question at the forefront of his mind. “How did you bear it?”

Roman cocked a brow at him. “Our friendship?”

“Hilarious,” Luc deadpanned. He gestured with a hand to the kitchen. “How did you bear…Danny? Loving a human.”

“Mm.” Roman crossed his legs and nodded as if he understood perfectly what Luc meant. And perhaps he did. To Luc’s surprise, he answered his question seriously. “It was frightening,” Roman admitted. “Horrifying, really. And of course, your antics”—he shot Luc a familiar glower—“made it all a thousand times worse.”

Luc waved the accusation off with one careless hand. “And yet you’re not here looking for revenge? I would be, were I in your position.”

“Danny would not like it,” Roman muttered darkly. He looked Luc over then. Slowly, carefully. Luc wondered what he saw. His old friend? His maker? The monster who had haunted him for decade after decade?

All of the above?

“Itisstrange,” Roman finally said, tapping a finger to his chin. “I would have thought…” He shifted in his seat. “With anyone else, if they so much aslookat Danny the wrong way, my demon wants to tear them apart on the spot. Rip out throats, drain bodies dry. It is a constant battle to contain myself, where he is concerned. And yet here we are… You hurt him. Trulyhurthim. And I am here, sitting across from you.” He laughed dryly, but his blue eyes were cold, icy. “You must have gotten under my skin, all those years by your side. I cannot think why else you still live.”

Why else indeed?

“I always knew you’d hate me eventually,” Luc mused.

“And why is that? Did you always have plans to ruin me?”

Luc propped one elbow on the couch arm, resting his head in his hand, forcing himself to meet Roman’s blue eyes. “Because I cursed you, on that battlefield. Instead of letting you rest in peace, I made you in my image. Horrifying. Wretched. Damned.”

Roman clucked his tongue at that. “I do not consider it a curse. Not anymore.” He looked out toward the back door, where his mate was not so subtly giving them space to reconnect. “It was a gift, that I lived long enough to find him. The other half of my soul.” He turned his gaze to Luc and sighed heavily, leaning back more fully against his chair. “I would not wish you to waste your own gift, Luc. That would be more disappointing than all the rest of it, I think.”

Luc didn’t know what to say to that. It was surreal enough, sitting in a living room with his former brother, his familiar adversary. Had he just been awarded grudging forgiveness?

They stared at each other for long moments. “Do you remember when I’d get angry?” Luc finally asked. “When you’d try to calm me down?”

---