I frantically call him back, but he doesn’t answer, and after the fifth time, my call goes straight to voicemail.
“He won’t pick up!” I scream and throw the phone at the side of the house, where it smashes into a hundred little pieces.
Ma pulls out hers and tries but shakes her head.
“He must have turned it off. What did he say?” I shake my head at her.
“It sounded like someone found something. He cursed and hung up.” Evelyn lets out a gasp, then a sob.
“No, no, no.” She collapses in the doorway, and Ma helps her up.
“We can’t think like that. Cami is strong. Whatever has happened, we need to have faith that she’ll survive it. Come on. You haven’t eaten, and you’re no good to anyone if you pass out. That goes for you too, Fredrick Allen.” Ma tosses that over her shoulder as she leads Evelyn through the house.
I sit my ass at the kitchen counter and nurse the coffee Ma hands me and pick at a muffin just to make her happy. What I really want to do is go over to the Danders’ place and ring all their necks.
Pa walks in, and one look at his face tells me he knows something but not how to say it. I shook my head, fighting back tears. I didn’t know I was on the verge of shedding.
“Just say it,” I choke just as Ma comes back down from helping Evelyn to bed.
“They found your flannel.” I grab the counter for support.
“Red, it was torn and bloody like an animal ripped it off her.” I look around the room in a trance.
I feel my legs stand, and then I fall to my knees, screaming with my face in my hands.
The world around me moves as the house fills with people who show up to help. The ranch has neighbors, bikers, and numerous law enforcement personnel scouring every inch of our land.
I eat, shower, and go out to help. All the while feeling like I’m in a daze. I keep seeing Cami out of the corner of my eye. Visions of her haunt me. The feeling of failure pressing into my chest like the hoof of a horse stepping on me.
Pa begs me to sleep, but I can’t. Not until I find her. Not until she’s safe.
On the second morning after her disappearance, the news crews arrive, and I refuse to talk to the media. Like every other morning Ma puts a cup of coffee in front of me that I take in hand on autopilot.
Then she slams a box on the kitchen counter, making me jump.
“You take this as some motivation.” I pick the velvet box up with a frown.
I flip it open and stare at my grandma’s ring.
“You keep that in your pocket. The next time I see it, it better be on that girl’s finger. Do you understand what I’m telling you, boy?” I’ve never heard her take such a tone with any of us.
My mother is the strongest woman I know. She’s brave, kind and loving. But right now, I’m actually scared to defy her.
“Yes, ma’am.” She nods approval and then turns back to making breakfast for the house full of people.
I hold the ring in my hand, and the light catches the diamond. It’s a beacon of hope shining in the darkness for me to follow home. And it belongs to Cami now, just like my heart and soul.
I’ll spend the rest of my days searching until I can give it to her.
Or die trying.
“RED!” I turn towards the door and see Ramsey covered in sweat.
My mouth opens to ask, but the words won’t form. My brother’s face is full of anguish and despair. I shake my head and step back, not wanting to hear a word of what he has to say.
I feel my father grab both my shoulders from behind me. He steadies me for what’s to come.
“Ramsey, please don’t,” I fucking sob the words.