Page 31 of Spoonful

What if he didn’t have Brent to worry about? Could he have seen where things might have gone with Hiro?

As it was, there were a million reasons why Hiro might lose interest in Jaylin. He could decide Jaylin wasn’t worth it, like so many other people already had. He could find out aboutBrent,and that would be a nightmare all on its own.

Jaylin should politely say no thank you. Should let Hiro become a happy memory. One that was tinged withmaybesandwhat ifsbut not colored unhappily with real-world disappointment

He should say no. He had to think of the right now, like always. He had to think of Brent—any time spent with Hiro was another chance for Brent to find out about him. He had to think ofHiro—the man didn’t deserve to be saddled with Jaylin’s baggage.

But…

He really didn’t want to.

He didn’twantto say goodbye to Hiro already.

It had been so fuckingniceto spend time with someone who was kind to him, who was maybe kind of into him, all the while without feeling like there was anythingrequired.

He wanted to hold onto this one small thing as long as he could, even if he knew it was selfish. Even if he knew it wouldn't last.

It was late, but Jaylin dictated a message anyway.“I’d love to. What time?”

Chapter 8

For the first time in his life, Jaylin discovered that time did actually fly when you were having fun. Classes were soeasynow, and he was keeping up with the work no problem while getting full marks on everything. He did all the extra credit he could too, which helped bump his grades even more, and even that was kind of a breeze?

On top of everything, Diego had turned out to be pretty great. He was kind of a talker, so during lulls in statistics class, Jaylin found out that Diego was in the culinary program but was also taking classes on business administration and restaurant management. There was some crossover with Jaylin’s business law class which led to even more conversation, and next thing Jaylin knew, he and Diego were… friends.

Which certainly made Professor Edison’s class a little more bearable.

And school going so well gave Jaylin plenty of opportunity to take shifts atEl Guanaco.In just a couple weeks, he had more money coming in than he had everhadbefore, on top of always having leftovers to take home. All the money he could spare got put into his savings, and watching that balance grow was…

It felt good. It felt really good.

It made Jaylin think about actually being able to break away from Brent sooner over later.

Because with everything else going well, Brent was the one dark cloud that still hung over his head. A big, miserable dark cloud. Because Brent had caught onto the fact that Jaylin was somehow less miserable and stressed out, so he’d been doing his level best to demand more and more. Longer and later stays. New positions. New toys.

There were handcuffs now. Every time Brent brought them out, Jaylin felt like he was going to be sick. Wearing them, feeling so utterlyhelpless—it made it so hard to breathe. Every time Brent put them on him, Jaylin was terrified they wouldn’t come off.

He couldn’t hold the sobs back anymore.

But Jaylin refused to let Brent burst his bubble. He had put up with a lot of shit in his life. He hadn’t made it this far just to buckle when some rich asshole pushed his boundaries.

It… it wasn’t easy. It was getting harder and harder with every day. He never felt rested. He never felt clean. He never feltsafe.

It’s worth it. It’s worth it. It’s worth it.

***

“A sugar art exhibit?” Hiro asked, taking the flier that Jaylin handed him and looking down at it with apparent interest. They were meeting at the cafe again after Jaylin was done with Aditi, and Jaylin couldn’t help but start to feel like the cafe wastheircafe. Hiro had asked Jaylin out to meet him there so often that Jaylin just…

Kind of thought of it as special.

“Yeah,” Jaylin said, trying not to feel shy. “It’s kinda like glass sculpture but with sugar? Sort of the same principle of working with molten hot stuff that can burn your skin off. My friend Diego’s a part of the show, and he invited me. I thought, maybe uh, you’d be interested?”

“Of course I am.” Hiro smiled at him, looking so pleased. “I’d love to go.”

“Okay,” Jaylin said, smiling back. It was nice to have done something right. To have offered an activity Hiro would enjoy. “Great. And uh…”

“Yeah?”

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