Page 88 of One Sweet Day I Found You

They both gazed off at the lake in silence for a minute or two. Should she speak first? He seemed like he had something in particular he might want to say, leading her here with such assurance.

But he stayed quiet. She waited another few seconds then took hold of his hand again, and spoke not to his face but to the emptiness in front of them. “Nick, I miss you so much.”

His voice was calm and even reassuring. “So, let’s talk.”

What was going on inside his head? She couldn’t read him right now. Her palms were sweating. She looked at him and he finally turned and looked her in the eye.

“So, listen,” Courtney started again. “Last week—that was my ex-boyfriend you met. We broke up, like, nine months ago. He dumped me—hard. He cheated on me, with my roommate. It was horrible.”

Nick interrupted. “Wow, that sucks. So how could you do the same thing to me?”

“What?” Courtney said. “I didn’t. Nick, this isn’t the same. I didn’t cheat on you. I know it looked like that, but…” She let her voice trail off.

Nick was unconvinced. “So, why was he at your place—overnight? And how am I supposed to believe you?” He pulled his hand away.

Courtney stared at him, his face full of questions, and Nick went on. “I guess I assumed wrong, but I thought we were exclusive. I mean, we never said it, but I…I didn’t think we had to. It just felt like we both agreed on that.”

“We were. We are! You were right—we didn’t have to say it. But I should’ve told you how I felt. I’m not seeing anyone else and I don’twantto see anyone else. Austin and I—we…” Courtney couldn’t bring herself to tell him everything yet. He sounded too upset. She had to bring him around first, get him to see where she was coming from. “He was in town for a bachelor party. It was totally by chance that I ran into him at The Anchor. We just talked.”

She looked at him, her eyes pleading. “You have to believe me.”

Nick listened, not saying anything. He scratched behind his neck nervously, still cautious.

“See, he and I never even talked after what happened between us last year. I just ran off to Australia to get away from him—from everyone. So, when I saw him, I realized how badly I needed closure. I was still a mess inside about him—not that I missed him, just that I never got to tell him how horrible he made me feel and what that did to me. I was involved with him for nearly a year, so it was a big deal to me. I had to finally deal with it. And Nick, I didn’t go seeking this out. I was just out to have a good time with the girls. He was justthere, and my past just came rushing back.”

Nick studied the ground in front of them as the last of the daylight faded to dark. He didn’t say anything, but Courtney could see his expression softening.

Courtney tucked some of her hair behind an ear. “And I know I never told you about him. I really should have. Maybe if I had you wouldn’t have reacted the way you did. It wouldn’t have come as such a surprise.”

“I get that—how you needed closure.” Nick sounded reasonable. “But yeah, we should’ve talked about this before. I was blindsided. I mean, I told you about Regina and how much all of that screwed me up for a while. What if the shoe had been on the other foot? How would you have reacted?”

Courtney considered that. If she’d have come to his place and found him there with his ex, she would’ve lost it, too. It would’ve been Austin and Alicia all over again for her. “I’m so sorry,” she said.

Nick took a deep breath. “But then, why didn’t you just tell me about Austin that night? I got called out on a rescue all day. You could’ve just sent a text to say something was up and I would’ve called you when I got home. I would’ve been okay with it if you’d explained. But why did I have to find out by accident? That’s what’s killing me—you lied to me. And were you ever going to tell me? Or were you just going to pretend like it never happened and leave me in the dark?” He gazed at the ground, his shoulders slumping.

Courtney didn’t answer. She had asked herself those same questions when she’d found Austin and Alicia together. Would she have ever found out if she hadn’t walked in on them?

“I just don’t know if I can trust you.” Nick ran a hand across his face nervously.

She had to make him believe in her. This wasn’t the same as her situation with Austin and Alicia. “I was going to tell you. But I was trying to get rid of him when you showed up. I didn’t want you to have to meet him. And I wanted to talk to you that night, Nick, but I never even heard from you.” Courtney was getting a little worked up now. “I mean—I get it that you’re called out and have to cancel sometimes, but I had no idea what was going on when I didn’t hear from you all day. It made me think I didn’t matter to you.”

“That’s not fair.” Nick got defensive again. “I was on a water rescue. My phone was off all day—there’s no service on the lake. I didn’t want to wake you up that night when I got back. I figured you were asleep. That’s why I only sent an email.”

Courtney stared into his eyes, frowning. “I know, and I’m sorry about that too. I shouldn’t have gotten mad about our date, Nick. I just wasn’t used to it. I know you get called out for rescues, so I gave you the benefit of the doubt all day, and I didn’t start to get angry until it got to be really late in the evening. I’m so sorry. It was really stupid. I should’ve trusted you. And I didn’t see your email until the next morning—after you came over.”

Nick sighed. “It’s okay. I’m sorry I confused you. I should’ve just texted you back that night.”

Courtney nodded slowly. “But, see, even if I had talked to you that day, and then run into Austin, I still would’ve needed to have it out with him. Honestly, this whole thing had nothing to do with you and me, except that it haseverythingto do with you and me. I had to get past my relationship with Austin to move forward with you. On some weird, messed-up level, I had to do it—for us.”

Nick let that sink in before he answered. “Really?” He looked her in the eye. “Because that is pretty messed up.” He grinned, lightening the moment.

She hadn’t seen those dimples in a long time. She took the moment to gaze with longing at the cut of his masculine jawline, his strong neck.

Courtney laughed at his joke and accidentally let out the sob that had been stuck in her throat. She had to be sure he understood. “I know. Itismessed up. But does it make sense?”

Nick looked at the ground again. “Yeah, it does.” He looked back up at her, half a smile creeping across his face.

She reached over and cupped his face in one hand, searching his eyes.

“So did it work?” he asked. “Are you totally over this guy now?”

“Yes, totally. I only want you, Nick. I onlyeverwanted you throughout this mess—and ever since I first met you,” she said. “Austin’s just a friend now. He went from enemy to friend. Lost his hold over me. That’s all that changed.”

He leaned in closer to her and Courtney inhaled his intoxicating scent, a duo of subtle woodsy and citrus flavors. She’d missed that scent, those eyes, that gaze, more than she’d even known. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry, Nick,” she said. “I just want you back.”

He took her face in one hand and lifted her face to his. Earnestly, he kissed her on the lips. She kissed him back softly for several moments, and then more fervently, eagerly.

Had she ever felt this way about someone? She didn’t think so. Was this what real love felt like?

She pulled him in closer and he returned the feeling with a greedy, hungry passion, his hands in her hair.

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