Page 94 of Did They Break You

“Yes,” I lie. “That’d be great.”

She offers me an uncertain smile, glancing again at my arm hidden under my comforter. Then she pulls open the door, adjusting her purple backpack on her back, and she walks out, the door falling closed behind her.

I hear her lock it, and only then do I let myself breathe again.

I fall back on my bed, my hands over my temples as I stare at the ceiling.

I can still smell him. Stillfeel him.

What am I doing?

I’m going to be late to class, that’s what I’m doing.

I sit up fast, flinging my covers off and hopping down from the bed.

I head to the closet, thinking to wear my usual jeans and hoodie, but I pause, thinking of Cortland’s words.“God, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this. Aboutyou.”

My phone vibrates on my desk and I turn to grab it, seeing his name on the screen.

Cortland

Good morning. I’m still thinking about you.

My pulse flutters as I hold my phone, but before I can respond, another message comes through.

A picture.

My heart jumps to my throat as I blink, squeezing my thighs together. It’s him, without his shirt on, his tan six-pack on display, his gray sweats pulled down low on his hips so I can see that deep V.

His lips are in the photo, his tongue just over his lip ring, but I can’t see his eyes. Nothing above his mouth.

My stomach flips as I realize his hand is under the waistband of his sweats.

I bite my lip, then run my tongue ring over my teeth.

Why are you so fucking hot?

But before I embarrass myself completely and actually say that, he sends another text.

Cortland

Send me a picture.

Then another, right after that as heat flashes through me and I start to get annoyed.

Cortland

It can be anything, I’m not picky. I just want to see where you are.

My heart beats too fast in my chest.

I set my phone down and turn toward my closet.

Then I get dressed.

A few minutes later, after I’ve washed my face and brushed my teeth, I pull up my fishnet stockings. I run my fingers through my fading orange hair, smiling at myself in the floor-length mirror on the back of the door.

An outfit I bought over the summer with Sloane on one of the few outings I’ve taken. I just never worked up the nerve to put these clothes on.

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