Page 76 of Did They Break You

After a minute, he finally replies.

Cortland

Let me make you love it again.

I know it’s the night making him say things like this. Maybe he’s lonely or feeling guilty. I know he doesn’t mean anything he’s texting me. And I know I shouldn’t be talking to him.

But he’s not the only one who’s lonely. I have two great friends, but neither of them were there that night. Neither of themunderstand.

And Cortland doesn’t either.Yet out of everyone in the world, he was there. Sometimes I like to think, the next morning when he realized what he did, his heart broke too.

No, thanks. I’m over boys and their balls.

I almost make myself laugh with that one.

His response is nearly instantaneous.

Cortland

Good. Stay away from them. Unless it’s me.

I chew the inside of my cheek, addicted to his words and hating them all the same. But it’s easier, texting with him. I don’t shake and I don’t tremble, and I know he can’t hurt me through a screen.

What are we doing?

After I send that text, nerves run through my body, fighting against the haze of my high.

He takes a minute to reply. Typing, then not. Typing again, then stopping. I close my eyes, my screen going dim.

Then it brightens, and I blink in the dark, staring at his message.

Cortland

All the things we shouldn’t.

But then I hear Sloane’s key flip the lock in the door. Hear her breathy voice say, “Honey, I’m home,” followed by a peel of laughter.

I think about her and Van both staying up with me last year when I couldn’t sleep. They don’t even love each other very much but for me, they came together.

And they’ve both seen me cry over him.Over them.

Because he’s one of them, whether I want that to be true or not.

He isn’t exempt.

As Sloane walks in, I send Cortland a message, then I flip over my phone and sit up in bed, smiling at my best friend, wondering howhe’llreceive my words.

No. We’re not. We can’t do this. Goodnight, Cortland.

CHAPTER

TWENTY-ONE

REMI

I haveto climb up on the counter to snag the whiskey. Someone calls my name down below with amusement laced through their tone, and other people are clapping, whistling loudly. I know they can see part of my ass, a slice through the denim just below my cheek. Something Silas would rip to shreds if he ever saw them.

But I keep them hidden until he’s away. When I can breathe a little easier. Whenever I’m with Cortland.

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