Page 133 of Elevator Pitch

“I don’t know what I thought you were going to say, but it wasn’t that,” I cackle.

“I’ve always been a mess, but that man loved me tenfold,” she sighs before pointing out, “Greyson does, too.”

“Greyson isn’t Robert.”

“Tell me why you believe he couldn’t beyourRobert? I hope you know whatever bullshit you try to feed me; I disagree with.”

“Damn. It’s like that?”

“Sure is. Come sit. I’ve lived in this building for many years, and I haven’t seen him with many women. He’s all about his business, friends, and Clifford, but he met you and made room. My husband was the same way with his companies and daughter when we met. He created space for me, and that was all I needed. It’s all you need, too.

What I want you to understand is that you can have it all whenever you stop standing in your own damn way. You’re in your own way, Selah. Look at everything you’ve built foryourself. Greyson doesn’t want to take anything away from you. He wants to give you more.”

I step into my office and sit at my desk, swiveling in my seat to face her.

“How do I get out of my own way?”

“I think that you need to keep your word and go to that wedding. Tell him that you do want to talk about what happened and how you feel because he deserves to know. I haven’t seen him around much. I’d assume he’s been working from home.”

That’s not like him.

“Whether you love him or not, don’t leave that boy in the wind. It isn’t right. I’d put my foot in his ass if he did that to you.”

“What’s stopping you from doing that to me right now?”

“This damn chair is too comfortable, and send me that link already,” she says with an eye roll.

I send her the link, and when her phone dings, she cheers excitedly.

“I’m scared, you know. I want to fix it. Not speaking to him has been torture. I miss him.”

“I know. You gotta get out of your own way, girl. Greyson will hear you out, but the ‘L word’ you’re so afraid of will cost you something you don’t want to lose.”

“I hear that. Thanks, Estelle.”

“Of course. Now, avoiding that sweet boy isn’t right, and based on what you told me about him, it might earn you some spankings. Sounds to me like you’re playing with fire. Unless you like having an ass that hurts to sit on.” She raises her hands in surrender. “Now you know I don’t judge.”

“I do like the spankings. He does follow up with a booty rub and a kiss,” I admit with a shrug.

“Well, I would like that too, shit.”

We break out in laughter.

I love this woman.

65

the dreaded ‘s-word’

Greyson

Manhattan, NY | April 23, 2024

My recent sessionswith Dr. Pierson have been rough, but I am not giving up. Therapy isn’t easy, and I’m proud of myself for finally getting to this point and sticking with it. We talked about Selah today and the upcoming wedding. She recommends I continue letting Selah have her space and of course, if she comes to me for anything, I should meet her wherever she’s at.

I unpacked her reaction and keywords she mentioned so we could dig deeper into that. Overall, I’d like to make sure that I am able to love her in every way she needs it and properly.That’swhy I’m here.

Selah and I still aren’t speaking to each other. I haven’t seen her since she ran out of my apartment over a week ago. I must admit not having her in my daily life has been torture. My house is empty without her laughter filling it. My bed is cold without her warmth. My plants are no longer thriving in her absence. Clifford misses her and Peach. They’d become good friends and then their parents stopped talking to each other. I’m worriedabout him, and I hope that for all our sakes, she and I can clear the air soon.

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