Page 89 of Please Save Me

“... Why?”

He took another drag of his cigarette before casting it into a nearby puddle. “Because I think you may find the information I receivedveryinteresting… and maybe somewhat relieving.”

I gave a slight nod, unsure what to make of everything going on. With that, Sebastian led me back to my truck before he climbed into my passenger seat. Tension grew in my shoulders as I opened the driver’s door and joined him inside.

Sebastian pulled out his pack of cigarettes. “Want one?”

I shook my head. “I quit smoking for Mason a few months back.”

He rolled his eyes before placing the filter of a fresh cigarette between his lips and lighting it. Smoke quickly filled the cab of my truck, and I rolled the windows down.

“And I’d prefer you not smoke inmyvehicle,” I warned.

“Fine.” Sebastian let out a wry snort before licking his thumb and forefinger and using them to extinguish his cancer stick.

I wanted to tell him to quit being such a brat, but it was easier to catch flies with honey rather than vinegar. So, instead of snapping, I killed him with kindness.

“So, what’d you want to tell me about Dale?” I continued.

“I genuinely think he is removing you from the church, which should mean you’re free to do whatever you wish.” His tone was flat, uninterested even, but his words caused the world to stop spinning.

A rush of adrenaline washed over me, causing a strange flutter to fill my chest. I couldn’t tell if nerves or excitement caused the sensation. The idea of being actually free was enough to have my mind swimming, but I still wasn’t sure Seb was telling the truth.

He was hard to read, and while I’d like to think he was changing into a better person, this could have easily been a trick. He could have just been trying to gauge my reaction like he was last night. So, I took a deep breath and tried to play it cool.

“Can I ask why you think that?” My voice shook slightly, and my fingers tingled.

Sebastian adjusted his emerald green tie, loosening it at first and then removing it entirely. He ran his thumb back and forth across the silky-looking material as he thought.

“He said something about looking for a new face for the church. He wants someone intelligent, driven, and handsome… Obviously, you’re none of those.” His words didn’t have the same venom they usually did.

“If I ain’t none of those, your standards must be six feet under.”

Sebastian’s eyes tightened into slits. “Oh, I’m sorry. Do youwantto be the chosen one for a cult that incinerates pregnant women?”

“... Well, no.” I’d just wanted to make him flustered. Part of me thought it’d be cute to see him get tongue-tied.

“Exactly, so you arefat, ugly, and stupid.” He jabbed a finger to my chest with each insult, but a subtle glow colored his cheeks. “Also, my standards are very high!”

I rubbed my fingers across my lips to cover my smile. Part of me wanted to tell himthank youjust to see if he’d blow a gasket.

“I’m sure,” I agreed, doing my best to stifle a laugh.

Sebastian crossed his arms over his chest as he looked away, muttering something about wasting his time by tracking me down. As much as I wanted to tease Seb a bit more, I wasn’t done actually talking to him.

“Dale didn’t mention having anyone in mind, did he?” I questioned.

“He, uh…” Sebastian leaned toward the door, resting an elbow on the frame. “Why?”

“Because, as much as I want to be free, it ain’t worth it if someone else fills my place.”

I’d been through approximately two decades of torment.Dale had killed my family, beaten me, slaughtered my lovers in the name of Christ, and that was just the tip of the iceberg. I wanted a life with Mason, to go out with her in public and raise Rosie with her. But none of that was worth having someone else go through the pain Dale inflicted on me.

Sebastian studied me for a moment, his expression blank. But, even if his features weren’t giving me much to go on, his eyes seemed nervous as they bounced around my face, never lingering in one spot too long. Eventually, he cleared his throat and turned away from me.

“I can’t confirm nor deny the idea of Dale having a specific person in mind… but I can say I don’t think he’s going to have an easy time convincingwhoeverit is to fill the position.” Sebastian’s words hung in the air as I struggled to grasp them.

If Dale let me go and no one filled my spot, the church would die, and with it, so would the Sons of Christ. This seemed too good to be true.

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