Page 103 of Please Save Me

“Have you ever loved someone so much that it physically hurts?” he asked.

The vulnerability in his voice caused me to pause as I mulled over his question. I couldn’t even fathom loving someone so much it hurt. I didn’t think love was supposed to hurt. “No, I haven’t.” I scratched my neck as I spoke.

“Well, I have,” Lucian continued. “I love my kids like that, and I love Mason like that. The thought of hurting any of them makes me sick.”

“Then why’d you make her cry?”

“Because I’m a dumbass!” he shouted. “I’m fucking stupid. Is that what you wanted to hear?”

His voice echoed through the area, causing me to take a step back. That wasn’t what I wanted. And, to be completely honest, I had no idea what I actually wanted out of this. The silence between us was suffocating, and I was more than a little relieved that this interaction was over. Still, I wasn’t done talking about this. And I knew exactly who I wanted to continue this conversation with.

I paced the creaky floors in Sebastian’s kitchen while he sat at the dinky kitchen table with his laptop, a cup of coffee and the world's worst-looking omelet.

“I just don’t get him!” I exclaimed after recounting everything. Honestly, I expected Seb to feel the same.

Lucian made Mason cry, and though I didn’t know much about Seb, I knew he loved Mason. Hearing about how Lucian hurt the woman he loved should’ve pissed Sebastian off. Instead, he seemed more focused on his computer.

“Seb–Are you even listening to me?”

His icy gaze drifted over to me as he picked at his mess of eggs, spinach, and what looked to be absolutely no seasoning. “I’m listening,” he said evenly, lifting the fork to his mouth. “I just don’t see why this is important enough to warrant engaging in conversation with you.”

My eyes must’ve nearly bugged out of my head because the second he finished chewing, the way he looked at me changed. Slowly, Sebastian grabbed a nearby paper towel and wiped his mouth.

“Look, I hate Mason being upset just as much as the next person,” he began, balling up the napkin before setting it beside his coffee mug. “But, she’s thirty-odd weeks pregnant. It’s incredibly easy to make her cry–”

“So you’re gonna take his side over hers?”

“... No?” Sebastian looked at me like I was about three different shades of crazy. “I just think whatever weird, old-timey instincts you have are working overtime.”

“I don’t have old-timey instincts.”

“Okay,Daddy.” He snorted into his coffee.

Frustration simmered just below my surface as I shot Sebastian a glare. “This ain’t a joke.”

“I am well aware that it’s not a joke.” Sebastian let out a resigned sigh as he slowly sealed his laptop, folding his hands over the silver case. “But, Lucian isn’t being abusive–Hell, I’d barely consider that abrasive.”

“What the hell do you mean? He literally screamed at Mason, and she didn’t do a damn thing!”

“Cameron, have I ever told you that before I got mixed up in all of this–” He gestured to his laptop, and instantly, I realized he meant before he killed Mason’s mom. “That I volunteered in a battered women's shelter?”

For a second, I thought he was messing with me, but that’d be a terrible thing to joke about. “I thought men weren’t allowed to help at those.”

He watched as I folded myself into the chair across from him. “Typically, no. But, I was a teenager, I was non-threatening, and I also double-checked to ensure my presence wouldn’t be triggering to any of those in need of assistance.”

“Why are you tellin’ me this?”

“So that you are aware of the fact that I can easily distinguish between abuse and a simple argument. What Lucian did was wrong, but, unfortunately, it’s nothing that would require me to intervene.”

I leaned back in my chair, suddenly not liking how rational Sebastian could be. “But, don’t you want her to leave him and marry you?”

This seemed like the perfect time for him to throw his weight around and get that. “I do. But I also want the knowledge that she picked me because she wanted me, not because my brother is a dumbass.” He paused to take a sip of his coffee. “I’m painfully aware of the fact that Mason loves Lucian just as he loves her. And because of that, while I’m willing to mend a broken heart, I’m not going to pull the two apart just because I can.”

My mouth went dry as I stared at him. I never expected a creep like Seb to have morals, let alonegoodones.

“What?” he asked, turning back to his breakfast.

“It’s nothing just….” I was finding things to like about Seb. Things that didn’t involve his appearance. “Forget it.”