Page 12 of Undone

“Well, sir, that sounds great.” I sat there for the next thirty minutes while Bridger went over the loan paperwork with me. As we talked, my stomach stopped churning, and by the time the conversation was over, I was eager to sign. “So, there’s no penalty for early or larger payments, correct?”

“None. Your statements will indicate the minimum payment due each month, but you can always pay more. In fact, I’d encourage it. Now, is there anything else you’d like to discuss?”

I shook my head, my thoughts already on the different to-do lists and how much of a dent we could make thanks to the loan. I stood up and reached out to shake his hand. “Thanks again, sir?—”

“Call me Andrew.” He stood up and walked me to the door. “The funds will be in your account by the end of business day.” He reached into his pocket and handed me a business card. “My cell phone number is on the back if you ever need anything I can help you with. Our families have both grown up in Poplar Springs and it’s important that we do our best to maintain our legacies for the generations to come.”

“I agree with you, sir, Andrew, one hundred percent.”

“Good. I have faith in you, son. You’ve got your father’s heart, and I expect to see great things from you.”

I left the bank feeling worlds more optimistic than I had been when I’d arrived. Having the bank loan as a fallback would ease a lot of the current strain and help us move forward with our plans…but at the same time, I thought about my dad calling loans “usury.” Was I potentially creating a problem farther down the road? I jogged across the street to my truck and before I had the seatbelt fastened, I’d already decided that I would try to proceed without using the bank’s money, keeping the money in my account as an emergency fund to use only if I needed it.

I pulled out into Main Street and immediately got boxed in by a horse drawn cart and a tractor. Resigned to the slow flow of traffic, I cruised up the quaint street lined with blooming foliage until I could turn off to head home. I rolled past our town sheriff who was currently giving a sobriety test to someone with a horse and barked out a laugh before giving him a friendly wave. Poplar Springs might produce some of the finest horses in the west, but it was still a quintessential small town with all its quirks, and I couldn’t imagine living anywhere else.

NINE

ZOE

Icouldn’t stop my hands from trembling, which didn’t make for good photos.

I was in the far field, the one that looked out to an endless blue sky bookended by a rambling mountain range. It was the perfect spot for getting photos for the new website because it included the ranch’s most impressive vista, along with the horses that were turned out in the fields in front of it. I’d managed to snag a dozen good long-distance images, where the horses were barely identifiable dots on the horizon but trying to get close-up images of them was killing me.

I’d promised Josh I’d have some photos for him to choose from by the end of the day and I never broke a promise, but I’d packed the wrong lens to take close-ups while staying a safe distance from the horses. The field was a good twenty-minute walk from the ranch, so I didn’t want to make the round trip again just to go back and grab the right lens. The only solution was to move closer to the few horses clustered by the fence that were actingwaytoo interested in me. I started to take a step, but my feet didn’t want to move. Nope, I wasn’t getting any closer. At least, not yet.

There were four of the massive things watching my every move from across the field, like they knew I was nervous. But weren’t horses prey animals? Easily startled and ready to run? Because this crew looked like a gang of thugs that wanted to beat me up and steal my camera equipment.

If I could get past my fear of horses, I might see how the white one looked a little like a unicorn, and the ebony one could double for Black Beauty. But the two brown ones both looked way too much like Jude for me to feel comfortable getting closer.

I sighed. If only Josh was with me, then maybe I’d feel okay about getting closer to them. He’d probably take the lead so I could approach, using his body for cover until I felt okay about being near the beasts. Then he’d speak in that soft, gentle voice I used to love, calming both the horses and me and making the lot of us feel okay about the interaction.

Instead, I was on my own and taking absolutely crap photos of them because they were so far away. Blurry, off-centered, amateurish shots that I couldn’t bear to look at. It was so unlike me.

I felt myself getting riled up. My perfectionist tendencies always got the best of me. A soft breeze bent the tall grasses and messed my hair, like a sign from nature to chill out. I closed my eyes and took a breath. Then another. My shoulders dropped.

The air smelled sweeter and the sun felt warmer on Lost Valley Ranch. My mind spun back to the days when I was a girl running through the fields with Shannon, hoping to catch a glimpse of Josh working around the property. I was happy to be in the magical spot again even though I still couldn’t figure out what was going on with Josh. I could swear that there was an undercurrent between us, but that didn’t make sense.

He’d told one of his workers that I was like asister. I shook my head. Okay, I’d take him at his word even though the way he looked at me felt anything but sisterly.

I raised my camera again and pointed at the horse gang. My hand trembled just as I pushed the shutter, and I knew there was no use looking at the image. I was done, my muse was gone, and the session had been a total waste because I needed to get back and work on some of my other projects. When I paused to scroll through to the landscape shots, I realized that they were actually really good, so at least I’d have something to show Josh.

I was sweating by the time I got back to the close-in fields, feeling bad for not packing the right lens. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn’t even notice Josh jogging out to meet me, looking like something out of a movie in his tan hat, plaid shirt, and tight Wranglers. My time in Denver hadalmostmade me forget that real life, romance novel cover-worthy cowboys were a thing in Poplar Springs.

“Hey there,” he said, his smile immediately putting a dent in my peevishness. “Got a question for you.”

“Hey,” I answered, trying to ignore the ridiculous schoolgirl flutter in my chest. I fiddled with my camera bag.

“I know you were never very into riding, so this might be asking too much, but would you be willing to test out a trail ride with me tomorrow?”

I wondered how my brain and body could react with such opposing force to the question. My brain screamed “No!” and my body went tingly at the thought of spending time alone with Josh. He was clearly asking me for a reason. Maybe he wanted to spend some time catching up? I also felt more than a little embarrassed that I hadn’t been fully honest with Shannon or with Josh about how deep my horse fear went. They knew I’d been on edge around horses after myfall, but I’d allowed them to think that I’d mostly moved past it. If Josh knew how much the idea scared me, he would never have asked.

“Why, uh, why do you want me to be the one to do it?”

His grin looked suspicious. “I need a complete novice, and everyone around here obviously rides all the time. I figured you’d be perfect! That is, unless you’ve turned into a barrel racer or something.”

“No, no, I’m still a newbie,” I replied, trying to hide my disappointment. I paused to consider it and refused to fall prey to my fears. “Yeah, I guess I can, sure.”

“Perfect.” Josh clapped his hands together. “I’ll put you on Sugar, she’s the gentlest horse you’ll ever meet. I promise you’ll feel safe on her. I would never put you in jeopardy again, Zo. I remember how scary that fall was.”

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