Page 50 of Undone

I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Crap, I can’t hide a thing from you.” He sighed and hung his head. “Okay, okay, fine, I’ll tell you. I’m happy for you, but this feels like the beginning of the end forus, that’s all. I promised myself that I’d be okay when the time came and I’m working on it, I swear. I just have to get used to the idea that you’re…leaving. And that whatever it is that we’re doing together will be over.”

“Josh,” I said softly, walking closer to him. “I might be leaving, but that doesn’t mean we have to say goodbye to each other forever. This isn’t like it was before. We’re grown-ups now, I think we can handle trying a long-distance relationship.”

He brightened. “Yeah?”

“Of course,” I replied. “And I think a great way to test it out would be for you to come with me to the interview. See if the East Coast is the kind of place you’d be okay visiting. If I get in, that is. Can you sneak away for a night?”

He looked around the barn as if seeking permission from the horses. “Yeah, maybe I can. That would be fun. I can’t remember the last time I left Poplar Springs overnight for anything other than to attend a horse auction.”

“Well then, you deserve a mini-vacation. I’ll get everything set up with the faculty, then check to make sure the timing works for you.”

“Zo, you got this,” Josh said.

“Thanks.”

We locked eyes, each contemplating what the news meant. Suddenly Josh seemed like he was being overcome by the need to be close to me, as if the chances of doing it were quickly slipping away. He dropped the stall fork and strode to me, tugging his gloves off and dropping them on the ground before dragging me into the empty stall.

Wrapping his arms around me, he drew me into a long, deep kiss that had me melting against him. When Josh started to pull away, I placed a gentle hand behind his head and drew him back to my lips for more. His hands slid down my back, cupping my butt through my jeans and lifting me up so I could wrap my legs around his waist. He turned, pressing my back to the stall wall and we continued to kiss. I tangled my fingers in his hair tugging at the strands until he groaned.

“Yo, Josh, you still out here?” It was Mitch.

“Yup, be right there,” Josh called back before reluctantly setting me down and helping me adjust my clothes. We left the stall and he reached down to grab his gloves, slapping them on his leg to knock some of the debris off. Before he could walk away to see what Mitch wanted, I stepped up close to him and tapped my finger against his chest.

“Nowthat’sthe kind of congratulations I want from now on, you got it?”

“Got it,” Josh answered, leaning down to kiss me again.

THIRTY-TWO

ZOE

Iglanced at my phone again. “I guess Josh forgot he promised to help me with interview prep tonight. He’s forty-five minutes late.”

Shannon was sitting across the kitchen table from me, polishing off a banana. “That’s not like him. Maybe something happened? I know he’s all focused on the next big group trail ride coming up. He and Eli have been working hard making sure the trails are relatively clean and safe for beginner riders, and then timing the rides on the different trails, so they can figure out the best places to stop for photo ops and breaks. Josh has always been serious and fixated when it comes to the ranch, but this intensity is new, even for him.”

I didn’t answer. A tiny part of me felt guilty for asking Josh to take time away from his job to help me prep for the interview, but he’d been the one to offer in the first place. And I’d picked a time at the end of the day, when I knew that his workload was lighter. So where was he?

“I bet his phone’s dead,” Shannon offered. “I swear his battery is constantly at like fifteen percent. He always forgets to plug it in.”

“That’s not the point. He said he was going to be here…” I trailed off, not wanting to bad mouth him in front of Shannon. “I’m worried about this interview. You know me, I don’t do well around large groups of people, and it’ll be panel style, which is as good as a firing squad as far as I’m concerned.”

I closed my eyes and took several long breaths counting as I inhaled and exhaled until I didn’t feel as if my heart would burst through my chest. I needed to do well at the interview and I already felt as if I were failing and I wasn’t even there yet.

“Let me help a little,” Shannon said, swiping the stack of index cards piled in front of me. “Pretend I’m a scary looking school administrator.” She sat up straighter, put on a dour expression, and read from the card. “First question, young lady: Why are you interested in Berkshire Institute of Technology?” Shannon dropped the card and frowned. “Hold up, that’s a terrible question. I bet I can come up with something better.”

“But Shannon, that’s like the first question they’re going to ask. I’m sure of it.” I’d googled typical interview questions, and this one was at the top of the list. I looked at the index cards, now out of my reach, and all the questions I’d written down were based on actual panel interviews for college entrances.

“Well, if you’re sure of it, you can prep and memorize the perfect answer on your own time. I’m here to give you the stuff that’s going to throw you off balance. To see if you can think on your feet. Like…uh…how do you unplug and have fun?”

I scowled. “They’re a high-pressure tech school, they’re not going to ask me that.”

“But what if theydo? Huh?” Shannon demanded. “Answer it, woman!”

I pushed back from the table with a huff. “Fine. When I want to unplug, I grab my camera and get lost in the viewfinder. Most of my life is in front of screens, but when I’m taking pictures, I’m like, I don’t know, apartof whatever I’m photographing. Doesn’t matter if it’s an animal, or a building, everything else disappears and my focus gets super sharp.” I paused. “Does that sound too weird to say? I never know if what’s in my head makes sense to the rest of the world.”

“It makes total sense,” Josh said from where he was leaning in the doorway.