Page 4 of Undone

My phone rang and I fished it out of my pocket only to see my mom’s smiling profile photo.

“Hi, Mom,” I sniffled as I answered.

“Hi, baby. You okay?”

“Yeah, I guess. I just got to Shannon’s and it’s…weird.”

My stomach twisted at the admission. The Cafferty home had always been a refuge when I was younger. My exuberant, outgoing parents had never quite known what to do with their shy, introverted daughter. They loved me, but they didn’t understand me—and vice versa. Shannon was the one who got me best, and staying at the ranch had always made me feel comfortable and relaxed, accepted as I was. So why did I feel like a trespasser now?

“How so, honey? You love Shannon.” I could hear rustling in the background. My mom, the most energetic person I’d ever met, rarely limited herself to one task at a time. From the sounds of it, she was folding laundry while we talked. Ronnie Wilson could not have a lengthy conversation unless she was also doing something with her hands. I never understood it, but she swore it helped her think.

“It’s not her, it’s Josh.” It came out in an angry huff, so I lowered my voice. “I overheard him calling me anoutsider. And he was so standoffish to me. I had reservations about staying here to begin with, youknow?” I mused. “Being forced to be so close to horses…obviously that’s an issue.”

“That’s understandable. Your accident was frightening for all of us.”

I unconsciously rubbed the arm I’d broken getting thrown from one of the Lost Valley horses when I was a kid. The bone had healed but what had previously been low-level anxiety around horses had turned into a full-blown phobia. I didn’t plan on going anywhere near the barns if I could help it.

“But you’re not going to let that hold you back, are you, honey? You know what I always say…” Mom continued, and I mouthed along with the words I knew were coming, “…put out a positive attitude, and you’ll get back a positive response! If you just believe in yourself, you can push past your fear.”

“Sure, Mom. I’ll…think about that.” Think about it, set it aside, and never, ever act on it. While my mother’s advice was always well-meaning, it tended to be more wishful thinking instead of actionable suggestions. I didn’t want to know what my mother would advise me to do about my history with Josh, so I chose not to bring that up.

Even though I couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Just seeing him standing in the driveway was enough to make my stomach drop. No matter how many years passed since that one scorching summer we’d shared, he’d always had the same effect on me: the top-of-the rollercoaster-just-before-the-drop gut clench.

Josh was always so different from everyone else in my life. Brash. Confident. A leader. And hot as hell. I still couldn’t understand how we’d ended up together. Back in high school, he’d been the captain of the football team while I was the weird little computer nerd. Aside from acknowledging me as Shannon’s friend, he’d never given me a second look. But then he’d come back for the summer after his first year of college, looking more grown up than when he’d left, and we’djust…clicked. It hadn’t lasted, of course. It was only a summer fling. But we’d parted on good terms, which was part of the reason why I’d thought it would be okay to go back to Lost Valley for an extended visit. Given what Josh had said about me to Shannon, I was wrong. Much like my mean girl roommates, Josh thought I didn’t fit in.

“Honey, it’s not like you’re there forever. This is just a layover, then you’re on to bigger and better things.”

I sighed. “You’re right. Once I’m accepted into that graduate coding program, I’ll be set. I’ll be back with people who get me.”

“Hey, Shannon gets you,” my mom said. “Don’t sell your friend short.”

“Yeah,” I snorted. “But apparently, she’s the only Cafferty who does.” The youngest Cafferty, Fiona, was never all that friendly toward me, and I doubted that had changed much since I’d last seen her.

The screen door slammed behind me, and I turned to glance over my shoulder.

Josh stood there, staring at me with a look that made it clear he wanted to talk to me. Scowling and smoldering in his typical Josh way. I debated staying on the phone and chatting just to annoy him. But “stubborn” was practically Josh’s middle name. He’d wait me out, which would also mean he would hear my side of the conversation. Better to get it over with.

“Hey, Mom, I need to run. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Stay strong, honey. You’ll get through this. Remember, it’s always darkest before the dawn.”

I couldn’t have stopped my eyeroll if my life depended on it. “Love you, Mom,” I said as I hung up, purposely avoiding looking at Josh. I could feel his eyes on me and I wanted to squirm, but I stood my ground.

“Zo, can I talk to you for a second?”

His use of my nickname irritated me. Only people who were close to me were allowed to call me that, and he clearly wasn’t anymore.

I turned to Josh. “No, you can’t. Thisoutsiderneeds a few minutes of solitude.”

He sighed and closed his eyes.

“I shouldn’t have said that. And listen, you were right. About our website.” He opened his mouth as if he would say more but paused before finally adding. “Wedoneed your help. I had no idea our website was that…broken. I feel like an idiot for not figuring that out on my own.”

I raised my eyebrows and gave him an expectant look.

“And I apologize for being a jerk about it.”

---