Page 30 of A King's Oath

Silence. The figurative kind. Literally, the car was quiet anyway. Samarth regretted sending the message now. Was it too much too soon? A religious guy who listens to bhajan in the morning with ‘mommy issues,’ as was a famous quote among their lot for any guy who dared show his softer side — did she even think of him as normal now?

His phone lit up with a message, the words clear on the top banner. Two words. Two words that did him in.

Her loss

Samarth’s nose tingled, his eyes suddenly heavy. But then Ava’s head landed on his chest, pushing like a little pony until he nudged his jaw up to let her burrow there. And his chest gurgled with a chuckle. She typed something on her phone, he could feel the vibrations. But now he didn’t care what she sent. This was it. Everything. It was like god had sent him back to school after this summer with the mission to get all that he never knew he wanted but needed so badly.Ava. Ava, who accepted so many hidden facets of him. Ava, who manipulated her whole world to be with him. Ava, who was a Krishna bhakt and openly accepted his bhakti. Ava, who called his mother leaving her loss.

People had called it her loss before. But when Ava called it that, it was final. Like a nail in the coffin. The ultimate truth. His phone lit up again.

Do you have more?

More what?

Songs like this?

Samarth felt his chest vibrate, and her body vibrate on top of his. He swiped up his phone and brought it up to her eyes, pulling up his Krishna playlist and handing it to her.

“ETA 20 minutes,” Kirti didi announced loudly.

“What? We had to get off at Valley of Flowers!” Kresha’s hoarse voice sounded. Ava paused their playlist and sat up straight. Samarth followed her up, glancing around at their exteriors. He hadn’t even realised when the dark outside had lit up with the soft rays of the morning sun. The dark trees were now verdant valleys, deserted roads filled with cars and people.

“Kumari, I cannot be with you both at the same time. I suggest we finish Badrinath darshan and then head to the Valley of Flowers.”

“But… Gop, we wanted those photos there at sunrise…” Kresha sounded deflated.

“It’s ok, babe, we’ll get them at sunset.”

She huffed, her head popping up to check on them. “All because of you!” She accused playfully. “What mannat is this, Samarth?”

He chuckled — “What mannat? Can’t I go to see god without any purpose?”

“It’s not your birthday,” she countered.

“That’s also a purpose.”

She sputtered, just like Ava.

“Sanskari Samarth, you have all of your old age to go visit god without any purpose!”

“Practising for that,” he quipped, making Ava sputter beside him. They were princesses by title, and yet behaved so wildly and so completely freely that only a fool wouldn’t want to be with them!

“Hey, Sam,” Gopi turned in his seat — “Is this a thank you for winning the Rajsamand Open? That’s not a purpose, is it?”

“No, man. It’s just a visit. I have been fascinated by this place ever since I heard its story from Hira ben. You remember her, right?”

“Yeah, your nanny…”

“Sort of, but more than that.”

“What was the story?” Ava asked.

“Do share with the class,” Kresha rolled her eyes, still sour about missing her sunset.

Samarth looked at Ava, hoping he could get out of this one. He wouldn’t want to tell a story in a group that didn’t want to hear it. Least of all such a special story. There was no way out of this though until their car sped through the embellished gates of Badrinath town.

“We are here. 1 minute,” Kirti didi’s voice saved him. Kresha reached inside her bag and began to put her appearance in place, Gopi drinking water, asking if there was a bathroom nearby.

The town was alive at this early hour, the devotees already walking towards the temple. Samarth got on his haunches and buried his head into the dicky behind them.

---