Page 102 of Dissent

Oh dear, where was this going? I tried to reason with him again. I knew every second we wereherewas a second that they were downthere, needing our help. “And Edith. We need to go—”

His head whipped up to look at me, hands running through his golden locks in frustration. “Fuck, Mara, would you just shut up and listen to me?”

Wes’s hazel eyes glistened and then flickered like the soft flame of a candle. Anger and hurt toiled within them, but there was something else. Something I couldn’t put my finger on. And at that moment, he looked so vulnerable…just like Chase did the last time I saw him. My heart instantly squeezed, stealing my breath, and I bit my bottom lip to keep from gasping. He took advantage of my silence.

“I get that you care about them. I do. And trust me, I know I’m not my brother.” He closed his eyes, pain etched on his face, shoulders slumped as though all the rage had been sucked out of him, leaving him deflated. “But he’s dead, and I’m not him. And I’m sorry that’s how it is.”

What was he talking about? What was he saying?

He looked at me then, gaze alive and wild with such intensity, they looked like burning coals. “But for god’s sake, let me save you. And damn it, Mara, whether you like it or not, I’m going to get you out of here,” he said walking toward me, one foot in front of the other, closing the gap with each definitive step. “I’m going to keep you safe. And if you want to hate me forever like everyone else, that’s fine by me, but you’ll be alive.” He was like a tornado—powerful and terrifying, breathtaking and mesmerizing—as he stood before me, face only inches away as his fierce eyes held me captive.

Lips parted, my breath escaped me in a silent gasp. “W-what are you saying?” It was barely a whisper. My heart drummed against my sore chest, but I would be lying if I were to say that the ache inside me was from the fighting, because it wasn’t.

“I wasscared, Mara,” he shot back at me. “When I found out they took you, and you were gone, I was fuckingscared. And Ihateyou for it.”

My whole body pulsed with the ferocity of his admission. He was sacred…forme?

“That’s why I came after you,” he continued. “Because I’d rather risk dying myself than sit in that infirmary freaking the fuck out about you.” He speared his fingers through his hair once more, eyes locking with mine, holding me prisoner. And then, it was like his flame blew out. The intensity within him collapsed as his shoulders slumped. And it was at that very moment that I saw him. I saw the same Wes I’d witnessed that afternoon at the Rock. The same man that shielded himself with harsh stone to protect a sensitive and vulnerable soul.

I saw Wes—thetrueWes.

I was at a loss for words. I didn’t know what to say or what to do. I felt so caught, trapped between the boy I was growing to love and the boy before me that was winning my heart. Dizziness swept through me as my vision blurred, but I steadied myself.

Wes finished closing the space between us, taking my hands into his own. His voice was soft, but I could hear the pain lingering on the edge. “Do you get it?” he whispered, one hand tracing the line of my jaw. “Do you get what I’m trying to tell you? I—”

I didn’t hear the rest of it.

My ears filled with a ringing sound that drowned everything out. His name slipped out from my lips in a breath, but it was muffled in my ears. I didn’t know if it was the pain from all my injuries overwhelming me, or if the blood loss, lack of food, and dehydration were finally taking their toll, but my vision faded as darkness crept in all around. And then I was falling backwards, my eyes rolling into the back of my head.

I felt Wes’s arms wrap around me, jostling my consciousness back to the present. The ringing subsided as a loudboomwent off down the trail, way too close for comfort. The ground shook beneath us. Wes cursed, muttering obscenities under his breath as he scooped me back up into his arms.

“Hang on, Mara. Stay with me. Keep your eyes open.” Then he was off running again, holding me firmly against his chest. “Just don’t fall asleep,” he said again. “We’re almost there.”

My mind was numb. I felt my vision going dark again, but I fought the urge to fall asleep. I was just so tired, but my mind was clawing at my consciousness. I couldn’t have possibly heard him right. I had to be dreaming, because all of this was too crazy, and I couldn’t do this right now. I couldn’t figure all this crap out. Everything hurt, the world was burning, and my life had been completely flipped upside down. I should fight him, scream at him to go back. My mind remembered Edith, and then Matias’s sweet face. My heart ached for them both, but there was nothing I could do for them now. Nothing I could say.

Nothing.

I didn’t know how long I laid there in Wes’s arms, being carried. It couldn’t have been long at all, but as my mind kept fading in and out of consciousness, I felt like time was passing oddly, as though each second was an hour. In and out my vision went, but the entire time I could hear faded screams, the firing of guns, and the explosions of bombs. At one point, I heard the thrumming of helicopters, the sound so loud that I could feel it reverberate in my chest.

My heart clenched tightly as fear renewed inside me. Was this the finale? Was Raúl’s final blow upon us? Would the planes above litter the ground with bombs or rain napalm down, destroying what remained of the forest, of us? My consciousness faded again. I could hear Wes talking to me, but I couldn’t make out the words anymore. I fought to keep my eyes open, but my lids grew heavy. And as I slowly closed them, I just focused on the sound. The constant sound beating in my one ear, the ear that rested against Wes’s chest. The beating of Wes’s heart.

54: Something

“Mara!”

My name came crashing into my reality, and as I opened my eyes, Wes’s face came into view. I noticed the feel of his hands on my shoulders, shaking me. The pain of his grip on my injured arm shuttered through me, jarring me wide awake as I gasped.

“Shit!” He scooped me up into an embrace, pulling me into him. I realized I was on the ground, lying on my back with Wes crouched over me. But now I was pressed firmly against his chest, more pain ricocheting within me. “I thought I fucking lost you.”

“Ouch!” I pushed back against him as hard as I could, my hands pressing against his shoulders and chest.

He released me, but grimaced as his hand flew up to grip his shoulder. I looked at him, noticing the blood drenching his shirt, but I couldn’t tell if it was his or someone else’s.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I offered. But it was as far as I got when the world spun on me again. I threw my hands to the ground, regaining some sense of stability.

“It’s okay…I’m fine,” he grumbled as he got up off the floor. He offered me a hand, which I accepted, and he pulled me to my feet. As I stood, the world spun again, and I felt as though I was about to fall back over. His hands were on me though, gentler this time, steadying me. I looked at him, and his bad temper quickly replaced the fear that was on his face. “Don’t you ever fucking do that to me again.”

I felt weak, but the knowledge that we justabandonedEdith and Matias came crashing back on me. My anger flared. “Me?Do you know what youdid? You left them!”

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