Page 57 of Dissent

I was alone.

Fingers found my necklace and pulled it out from underneath my shirt. As my thumb rubbed the antiqued metal, cool spring air kissed the tears on my cheeks. The idea of a free Telvia came to mind as I watched the water ripple by.

That’s what I wanted to be…free.

But freedom seemed to elude me. I spent my whole life eagerly waiting for my Initiation Ceremony, waiting for the day I turned eighteen, because a part of me needed to believe that, on that day, I would be free from Raúl. I wasn’t stupid though. I knew he would never let me go, but I allowed myself the fantasy. It was the only thing that helped me get through those dark days in the basement. Now here I was, my birthday around the corner, living among rebels who were fighting for a free Telvia, and, in so many ways, I was still a prisoner.

“Need a friend?”

I jerked, startled by the voice. Whipping around, my eyes fell onto brown locks and matching eyes. I couldn’t help but smile at Matias and shrug. “Couldn’t hurt.”

With a smirk, he stepped closer and lowered himself onto the bank beside me, his shoulder and thigh grazing my own. A flutter passed through me.

“You didn’t show up to your training session.”

I sighed, running my fingers through my hair. “Yeah, I know. Sorry about that.” I turned away from him, watching the water flow.

“Want to talk about it?”

I weighed that in my head.DidI want to talk about it? “I don’t know. I just feel like everything is upside down, you know?”

He nodded and waited patiently, giving me the space to think.

I wasn’t sure how to explain it to him. I couldn’t even find the right words to explain it to myself. So, I just started talking, letting the words flow as they wished. “Sometimes…sometimes I just feel trapped. In Telvia, I always felt like I was a prisoner in the palace, and I couldn’t wait to leave it. And now I’m here, and in some effed-up way, I…I guess I still just feel like I’m stuck.” I peeked a glance at him, but his stoic expression gave nothing away.

Silence settled between us, and we both looked off at the river flowing.

“You know,” he finally began, “the river may have boundaries, but it’s still allowed to flow freely.”

Arching my brow, I eyed him. “Meaning?”

“Meaning that sometimes life has unexpected turns and bends that force you into directions you didn’t originally intend or even want. But that doesn’t mean you’re not free.”

“Or maybe that’s exactly what it means. Maybe it means that you only have the illusion of freedom, but everything’s already been predetermined.”

Now it was his turn to arch a brow at me. “Is that what you believe?”

I looked away. “I don’t know what I believe anymore.”

Gentle pressure on my chin guided my face back to his. “What do youwantto believe?”

Something about the way he was looking at me, like I was the most precious thing in the world, made it hard to breathe. “I don’t know.”

His gaze held my own, and I felt myself melting into his touch. I wanted it. I wanted to lose myself in him. His eyes lowered to my lips, sending a wave of heated anticipation through me. Because if what I thought I saw in his hungry eyes was any sign of what he was thinking, I was all for it. I was ready, my heart fluttering like the wings of a bird.

“I can tell you whatIbelieve.“ He didn’t wait for me to respond. “I want to believe that the curves of life brought you here. That you were meant to be here…with me.”

My lips parted with a silent gasp as his thumb passed over my bottom lip in the softest of strokes. He drew near, face so close to my own that I could feel the warmth of his breath upon me.

I dared to respond, my voice coming out as a whisper. “I want to believe that, too.”

The corners of his lips tipped upward into that smile that dissolved my heart, and when he was so close that we shared the same breath, I could feel his lips skating across mine as he whispered. “Mara?”

I shuddered at the sound of my name, lungs aching for air. I didn’t dare move. I didn’t dare breathe. “Yes?”

Lips so soft, so smooth, mouthed back, “May I kiss you?”

My whole body coiled tight as I closed my eyes, ready for this new reality, the new curve life was thrusting me on. I uttered, “Yes…”

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