Page 55 of Vows of Betrayal

I didn't want to wake him.

I couldn't wake him.

Most nights, he slept like the dead. For the first few hours, at least. His body was still healing. He was able to do more and more every day. But it definitely took its toll on him physically.

I silently slipped on a hoodie and my sweats over top of my tank top and shorts. Then I set out to pack what I could get into my backpack and a few bags. Not that I had much. Most of the kitchen stuff was Bernie's. Not that I'd take it with me, anyway. But I grabbed what I needed. I would only be able to do one load, so I needed to make it count. Once I closed the door on this place, I wasn't coming back.

My phone suddenly lit up, and I panicked.

And then I freaked out when I saw who was calling.

Dammit.

Not him.

Crap.

What the heck did he want?

I instantly turned my phone off so it would stop buzzing, and I looked over at Stefan. If he woke up now, I would be in deep, deep trouble.

I waited a full minute—but he didn't move.

Thank goodness.

I pulled the envelope out of my backpack before I slipped it on. Then I set it on top of the dresser.

Stefan would find it when he woke up.

A burning sensation started behind my eyes. I picked up the bags and headed out.

I told Bernie a few days ago that I was moving out. He wouldn't be surprised not to see me again.

My stomach clenched at the thought of not coming home to the smell of corned beef ever again.

Or to Stefan.

It really hadn't fully sunk in yet. That last night would be the last time I'd ever touch him. Or kiss him. Or do all the other wonderful things to him that he taught me to do.

And he wouldn't do any of the fantastic things he did to me.

Ever again.

I'd so wanted to give him my virginity. I wasn't quite sure why I'd hung onto it for this long.

It was stupid.

But Stefan wasn't fully healed. So, I lost my chance.

Stefan would have been a wonderful first.

With the care and attention he always took of me while we did—other stuff—I knew he'd be the perfect man to go all the way with.

But that time was lost forever now. Which made me want to sit down and cry.

First, I had to get the heck out of here before Stefan woke up and saw that I was gone. Just thinking about what he'd do when he first realized I'd left—gave me a sick feeling in my stomach.

As quietly and carefully as I could, I stepped down the stairs one at a time. Half of me wanting to just toss my belongings over the side of the railing, and the other half of me wishing Stefan would suddenly open the door and yell at me to come back to him.

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