Page 98 of Speak

“Baby you okay?”

She looks behind me as I take my seat by the window. “Jonas, how lovely to see you. Our children never mentioned you’d be joining us.”

“Well, as if Raven would have, Sofia.” John retorts with a cool smile that doesn’t meet his own green eyes. Out of the two of us, Axel looks more like their child than I do.

I shift in my seat uncomfortably and clench my hand into a fist under my overcoat and Jonas scoots closer to me.

“It’s alright, mi amor, I’m sure this was all last-minute details.” She says with a pinched smile. “I’m glad you covered those thighs of yours, mija.”

I look at the window and let the scenery pass me by, letting the forced conversation flow around me like it always does. A ghost. A specter. A doll with perfect hair, a few chinks in the porcelain and glass eyes forgotten in the corner of the room.

______

The wake is at Grimm & Sons.

I love it.

Repulsive, I know, but something about this place gives Dracula vibes with the heavy black velvet curtains, retro sconces on the walls, the black and red paisley patterned carpet, the deep red chairs, the casket sits on a dais, with white and deep blood-red roses and actual candles with flames dancing placed around it.

It looks ritualistic.

I’m on Jonas' arm, my hand curled around his bicep, happy I decided to go with ballet flats instead of my stilettos. I was expecting to see a lot of familiar faces but I wasn’t expecting hers.

Sabrina is by the bar in a dark berry power suit and sharp black heels and she almost runs to me. I clutch Jonas' arm so tightly I could probably tear through his jacket.

“Oh my god it’s really you.” Her slight English accent still sounds exactly the same. She forces me into a hug and my entire body goes rigid. Jonas lightly pushes her off me. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

“Oh, Raven, is that really you?”

My vision blurs. Thatvoice.

“Oh, it’s so good to see you.” Ashleigh says, her own hand tight on Thadd's bicep.

“You aren’t getting out of here alive, bitch.”

Music begins to play, but nobody takes their seats. I look around, seemingly nobody else hears it. The melody it’s…

“Are you okay, Ray?” Ashleigh asks.

Louder. It’s getting, so loud.

“C'mon, Ash, let’s go take our seats. Jonas. Raven.” Thadd says and my brains feels itchy. “Brina, your father is over by Mr. Hamilton. We should say hello.”

“I don’t need your money, I need you to die.”

“Yeah… erm… okay. Raven it was… lovely to see you.” She answers but it’s all muffled. The fucking music. I stare after Ashleigh who's peeking over her shoulder at me.

“Baby? You okay?” The music stops, zapping me back to life.

No, my brain is on fire, I want to say but nod instead.

“Oh, let’s go say hi to my parents.”

And then I meet Jonas' parents. A very kind couple that look at Jonas as if he’s hung the moon. Elena Anderson, lovely as can be with red hair and green eyes, pulls me in immediately. “Oh, darling! We’ve heard so much about you! Oh, I love your overcoat. Where did you get this? I must have one!”

I can’t help the smile that tugs at the corner of my lips. I keep my hands low and sign to Jonas. But Elena surprises me. “Oh yes! I saw this in their catalog! We must go shopping, darling you have impeccable taste. I should know, you’re dating my son.” She winks with a giggle and her laugh fills me up. It feels like… a mug of hot chocolate after you’ve been playing in the snow all day. “Henry!”

“Yes dear?”

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