Page 107 of Speak

Damon shakes his head.

"If you'll excuse me I have a lot of paperwork to fill out." She replies and turns to wait for her colleagues to finish their reports with the brawlers.

I turn to him who's still looking after the direction Raven went. "So just like that? One little twirl of her finger and you go against doing the right thing?"

Damon eyes me up and down, the muscle in his jaw tics. "She has the proper reasoning for not pressing charges."

"And they are?"

He shakes his head at me and licks his lower lip.

"How do you even know what she wants?" I ask, even though I know she uses sign language with him... probably Jonas. Everyone but me and the rest of us outside of their precious little bubble.

He scoffs at me, and I can see his tongue rubbing along the back of his lower teeth. "I made a mistake in thinking you could be with her, to help her in this. You live in a world of black and white, a world where people like her balance in the various shades of greys and silvers. You saved her life, yes, and you helped Jonas, which I appreciate. We thanked you and I'll thank you again. But seeing the way she looks at you, weary, untrusting... she would never tell you anything. I would never tell you anything that’s hers to tell. Both as her doctor and as her partner. You're too deep in the black and too deep in the white, Professor. You live in a world where the police actually help instead of harm. This is far deeper than you could imagine. The grey she lives in isn't even grey anymore, it's..." he looks around trying to find the word.

"Purples." I finish for him.

He stands a little taller and gives me a curt nod. "It's purples and if you aren't prepared to live in a world of color, leave her alone, Maverick. Let her go."

As if I haven’t been trying to. I justcan't. Iamdeep, whether the shade is lilac, dark plum, or even the most violent of violet. I want in. In her mind, her world, her body. I want to claim her soul. Even if it's just once. I’ll take whatever crumb she gives me.

God, I’m pathetic.

Jonas leaves the room he was in, the other officer behind him. He walks over to us slowly.

"I need you to go talk to her."

"What did you do?" Jonas questions. I want to laugh. Is he that in sync with her? To already know it was Damon's fuck up?

"Go to her. I have a feeling she's going to do something drastic just to spite me."

I perk up. "Like what?"

Damon's eyes sparkle mischievously, appealing to my raw nature. "Like something she'll need to be punished for."

Iloathehim.

But at least now, I have a reason to text her. So I do, and when I'm back in my classroom, preparing for my second hour's lecture, I decide to... sign up for an ASL course online and begin, learning between each lecture, only to go home, pass her empty house and proceed with my courses before grading papers.

I really need a TA.

______

Tuesday afternoon, after my last lecture of the day, I spot Jonas at the Koffee Kart, and where there's Jonas...I spy a silver-streaked siren kiss him and make her way to her family's library. I sneak past him and keep a safe distance behind her, silently stalking. I look up the stairs that fucking little skirt of hers hit against the back of her thighs with each step, giving me access to look up so easily, spotting lavender cheeky panties. She glides to the third floor, likely to get a book for my class.

I stare from the side as her fingers trail along the spine, as though she's feeling the power within the pages. Her hair is down and it's grown longer, hitting the middle of her back in dark mahogany waves, like tresses of chocolate.

She turns to face the shelf, head tilted to one side as she looks up. So damn beautiful.

I go to her, that damn song of hers commanding me. I'm merely a foot away when my hands reach out and suddenly they're around her waist, loving the feel of her against my front. The top of her head reaches the middle of my chest and I can smell the faint shampoo in her hair. I close my eyes and take a selfish moment for myself to relish being so damn close to her. My hands find purchase on those shapely hips of hers, made for childbearing and I almost growl as I lower my nose to the shell of her ear and simply ask, "Is this where you hide?"

I feel her tense up, obviously not expecting me and I both hate that she wasn't andlovethat she's fearful. She turns to me, lips parted, ready for my kiss, those warm brown eyes like dark honey. She takes a step back, and her spine hits the shelves but I move with her, my hands dropping with that fucking little skirt, unable to stop myself because I need it up. I need to pull her panties to the side and shove myself into her.

No one would know.

"If you aren't prepared to live in a world of color, leave her alone, Maverick. Let her go."

I fuckingcan't.

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