“That’s the one,” I said, not forgetting him asking me for sex not that long ago.
“Sorry, that sounded bad. I didn’t mean it like that. I’m happy for you.”
I hadn’t expected that from Casey. He always came across as self-centered, as a lot of models are. Then again, sometimes I caught glimpses of him, a depth he kept hidden. His behavior could’ve been to protect himself, which also wasn’t unusual. This industry was harsh, and any signs of weakness could eat you alive. And he needed this job a lot more than I did.
In a surprising moment of vulnerability, he rubbed his face and said, “God, being a model changes you, you know? I wasn’t always such a dick. You’re, like, the only friend I have here, and we barely have friends as it is. I’ve been kind of shitting on it, I know. What’s your guy’s name again?”
I bumped his shoulder, grateful to see a human underneath that perfect skin and hair. “His name is Ryder. He’s sweet, kind, and so down to earth. He’s really changed me in a good way.” It was funny because I didn’t think I needed all that much change. But if anyone could keep you grounded in reality, it was Ryder.
“You love him?”
I looked at my suddenly blossoming friend, his brown eyes watching my every expression. “Yeah, I really do.”
“Must be nice. I’ve never been in love before. It’s so lonely with this modeling gig. God, I’d love to have someone to hold and who loves me back.”
“You will one day. It’s… an incredible feeling to not only love but to be loved. I’m fortunate.”
And two amazing men felt that way about me. I had no idea what I did to earn it, but I took it greedily.
“You’re different from the other models,” he admitted.
“I’ll take that as a compliment. Probably because I’m not dependent on this job.”
“That makes sense. You’re so…”
“I know I’m privileged, Case.”
“I was going to say lucky.”
He smiled at me, which was soft and not without some pain threaded through it. “I’m seeing someone, but we’re not there yet, though he tells me he wants me. He’s even said he loves me, but… I just…”
“Just what?”
“I’m not sure I believe him, but god, do I want to.”
“Maybe give it time and a chance.”
He nodded, not looking like he believed me. “Maybe. Well, I’m really happy for you.”
“Thanks,” I said, hardly able to contain my shock at Casey’s change. What brought all that on?
“Finn Larson,” the photographer’s assistant called.
I stood and headed into the photoshoot room, wondering what Marc Laurent had in store for me that day. I only hoped it would be a normal photoshoot to boost my portfolio, though I didn’t think I needed it. But my agent felt I did, so I went.
Don’t ever say no, I repeated in my head. As much as I hated that, it gave me a lot of business and told those who hired me that I was easy to work with. I was a good little clothes hanger.
As soon as I walked in, his assistant closed the door behind her, leaving me alone with the photographer, making my stomach clench.
He scanned me up and down lasciviously, and I rolled my eyes inwardly. Asshole. Regardless, if he wanted me naked again, I would have to do it. It was in my contract that I was willing to do so. Turning him down put my career at risk.
“Welcome, Finn. Please get undressed.”
“You have nude photos of me already,” I said, regardless of not being allowed to say ‘no.’
“I only have those you did with Mr. Barnaby. I have none of you alone.”
Fuck me. Whatever.