Page 39 of Milked

I took another sip of warm wine as I processed my words. “Finding love through grief is sad, yet heartwarming and uplifting. While it’s unusual that you’re stepfather and stepson, I know it can happen. I think as long as it’s all consensual, it’s fine. You two clearly love each other, and that is also uplifting.”

“I do love him, with everything I have. Do you want love?” he asked carefully.

“I thought I did once. That’s what’s expected of us, right? Find a boyfriend or girlfriend, fall in love, get married, and have kids. That’s all they do in my town. Heck, there’s not much else to do in the town I grew up in.”

“Have you told your parents you’re bisexual?”

I shook my head, but before I could answer, plates of raw fish were put on our table, all beautifully decorated with leaves, sliced ginger that looked like a rose, and even some orchid flowers were placed there.

Finn rubbed his hands greedily, grabbed his chopsticks, and plucked up a slice of fish.

“I don’t know how to use chopsticks.”

“I’ve got you.”

He gave me a quick guide to holding chopsticks. It took several tries before I could hold on to the slippery fish, but I finally managed. I dipped it into the combination of soy sauce and wasabi, then shoved the whole thing into my mouth, slowly tasting and savoring.

When I swallowed, I grinned at Finn. “You’re right, this is really good.”

“Ha! See? It pays to know and trust me,” he winked. “So go on and answer my question.”

“No, I haven’t told them. What’s the point? It’s not like I was going to date a boy in Blair, Nebraska. I wouldn’t know a gay guy to save my life back there even if there were any.”

“What about college?”

“By that time, I didn’t have the guts to do it. There’s too much uncertainty. I thought it would be different in a bigger town…” Then there was that huge crush I had on my best friend. I shrugged and tried the octopus roll, which was better than I expected, and fucking spicy too, but I liked the kick. “But with you and Knox, you gave me that certainty and left little room for doubt about what you want. You took all the fears and guesswork out of it.”

Finn also picked the octopus, dipped it in his sauce, and put the whole thing in his mouth. When he finished chewing, he wiped his mouth and smiled. “Yes, I can already tell that about you. Being in the modeling business—and after spending so much time at the club—I’m a pretty good observer and learn what people like and don’t like.” Finn leaned forward to speak softly. “I learned Father likes to watch, which is the main reason you’ve come into the picture. Cuckolding seems to be his thing.Mything is to be an exhibitionist and to be the center of attention. Andyourthing is to be controlled and dominated.”

“Yeah… I’ve recently learned that. I like not… thinking.”

Finn leaned back and tossed the rest of his sake down his throat. “One day, Father and I will take you to the sex club. We love putting on a show there, and we can do it safely with our identities hidden. It’s the only way we can be open with our love without the risk of destroying our careers. Do you think that would be something you would be into? You could wear a mask so no one would see you.”

“You mean, people would watch us…”

“Yes. Some people love to go there just to see the live sex. Sometimes, couples let the guests get involved. We can do whatever we want there without fear.”

“I’m not sure. Maybe. I mean, I haven’t even had sex with y’all yet.”

Finn’s smile turned crooked. “Oh, that’s coming very soon,Sweet Boy. Father does love calling you that.”

My face burned again, and I shoved more fish into my mouth to hide it, making Finn giggle.

After lunch, Finn’s driver took us to Tysons Galleria in McLean, Virginia, which had more high-end shopping than the original shopping mall.

He first took me toBalenciagasince he’d been a model for them a couple of times and had done a runway show.

Jesus, a pair of jeans was over two thousand dollars, but Finn was insistent.

“Can’t we find something a little cheaper? This feels… excessive.”

“A few pieces to mix and match is all you need.”

He tossed two pairs of baggy jeans into my arms, one in distressed black and the other in a light wash. Then he handed me a black crewneck sweater withBalenciagawritten on it in a dark gray.

“Fall is coming, so you want some warm things. Now go try those on.”

I stepped into the large dressing room, with Finn following me.

---