Page 15 of A World of Ruins

‘What does that have to do—’

‘Why do youignoreher? Or better yet, what is happening between you and Iker? I have never seen him like this, so what have you done?’

As he shakes his head, he makes a noise at the back of his throat, almost like he wants to laugh. ‘You sound just like Father once used to.’

‘Why? Because I am calling you out on what I’ve witnessed lately?’

‘Because you’re quick to blame me.’

My brows pull together, and I wonder why he believes that. I might have been too young to remember specific moments between my father and Idris, but I never once felt he blamed him for anything. ‘I—’ My tone is lighter. ‘I am not blaming you, Idris. I am simply—’

‘Worried?’ he cuts in, giving me a pointed stare. ‘As am I, Nara.’

I look away, knowing he definitely thinks of me first. I cannot fault it when I have an urge to look after him too.

‘I kissed her.’

My head swings in his direction at an abnormal speed. His gaze is elsewhere, not wanting to look at me after confessing to kissing my best friend. Though I already know about it, it doesn’t mean I would have mentioned it. ‘And do you . . . regret it?’

It takes him five seconds to answer. ‘Yes.’

I scoff. ‘Liar.’

The silence between us melts into me. It is the kind where I do not know if he will answer or if he will walk out of that door like he used to do whenever I confronted him about anything. I steel myself for the second option and stare at my brother as he turns his back to me. He runs both hands through his chestnut locks, and I wait. I wait for it—

‘I do not want to commit to someone.’

My eyes struggle not to widen.

He turns to me, despair and exhaustion consuming his expression. ‘Freya is young and too full of life to have to deal with me.’

Hating how he thinks so low of himself, I shake my head frantically. ‘You are not some broken man, Idris.’

‘But I am also not ready.’ He shoots me one of those severe looks before sighing as he walks up to the window. ‘I don’t knowif I ever will be, and I don’t want to keep her waiting in hope that wewillbe someday.’

‘And Iker?’

‘He started spending quite some time with Freya while you were away. I suppose somewhere along the way, he developed feelings.’

I suppose it would have been hard not to under the circumstances they were all in.

‘Does Freya know this?’

He shakes his head. ‘I thought Iker was being childish at first, liking her to annoy me, but something snapped in him when he saw Freya upset because of me.’ He looks over his shoulder at me. ‘We’ve argued so much ever since.’

A heavy sigh pulls out from my chest. I can see how much this hurts him. Yes, we might have all argued as a family back in the village about the most nonsensical things, but never about love. Idris knows heartbreak; he has loved and lost, and I think, in many ways, he understands me more than Illias and Iker do when it comes to Darius.

‘Miss Nara!’ Tibith’s little footsteps tap across the floor as he runs inside the room. He jumps onto my calf, hugging it tightly as he says, ‘I have missed you tre-tremendously, Miss Nara!’

I chuckle as he releases my leg, and I kneel to bop his nose. ‘As I have you!’

He giggles, rubbing his belly. He has no idea what happened with Gus or Freya, and I would like to keep it that way.

As I look up, my smile falls when I see Idris start to walk away.

‘Idris,’ I call, and stand as he turns to me. ‘Father wouldn’t blame you for any of this.’

He tries not to show any emotion, but fails as his forehead scrunches and he looks at me like he could just cry.

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