Page 96 of The Boss

“Good God, Jules, you look like you want to rip my throat out. Did that girl really mean that much to you? Are you still harboring that much resentment in your fickle heart?”

“Shut the fuck up. I saw the way you were acting around Alessa, too...”

They had met multiple times, such as when everyone was in town. Every meeting was Ted flirting with my girlfriend like he had every right to, and Alessa eating it up… either because she didn’t realize it, or she wasn’t threatened by my brother. As for Jordan? I’ll never know what he sees in my playboy brother. Maybe they have an open relationship. I. Don’t. Care.

Ted drops his carefree façade. It’s not often I see the serious side of my brother. Outside of a boardroom, anyway. Ted is the type to go hard or go home at work, but outside of it, he wants to be everyone’s best friend… even if he doesn’t remember their names. As for me? For a guy who never paid any attention to me until we were both adults, I don’t know why he thinks we can be best friends. It’s not in my personality to have that kind of relationship with anyone in my family, let alone mybrother.

“It was never my intention to make you angry, Jules. I acted that way around Alessa because I genuinely liked her. As a partner for you, my stupid baby sister who wouldn’t know love if it crapped on her filet mignon. I hate to think I was the one who got the last of Mom’s ability to love in her womb, but seeing how you and her both turned out…”

I know he’s not comparing me to our mother.He is not.

“Hey, come on. You’re a closed-off gal, Jules. That’s why I was excited for you to meet someone like Alessa. Both Jordan and I thought you found someone who made you happy.”

“And Savannah? Did you seduce her away from me because she wasn’t making me happy enough?”

“Low blow, kid. I never stole that woman from you. A man can’t steal anyone from someone else. Doesn’t work that way. Takes two…” He catches the look of disdain on my face. “All right. It was wrong of me to pursue something with her when she was obviously with you. But I want to clear the air and say that it was a mutual feeling between her and me. I think. I honestly don’t remember her well.”

Oh my God, I’m going to clock him on his wedding day.

“Fuck you,” I finally say. “Just… fuck you, Ted.”

“I’ve heard that a lot in my life. Trust me. I know what a shithead I can be. Great in the office, not so great in the home. I took on the brunt of our parents’ shitty parenting by emulating them instead of figuring shit out on my own. I never even considered marrying someone until Jordan. And I still fucked it up and drove him away for a while. When we got back together, I spent a million years apologizing and making it up to him. I fucked up bad.”

My head is pounding. As much as I want to lash out at my brother some more, I know it won’t do any good. Not for him, not for me, and it sure as hell won’t get me Alessa back… or Savannah, for that matter. After Ted was quickly done with her, I never heard from her again. “What happened, anyway? He told me that the pressure of dating someone like us got to him.”

“Two things happened.” Ted turns off his phone, which continues to blow up with messages from the wedding planner. “One was my fuck up, and the other was Mother.”

“Oh, God.” I can only imagine.

“Yup. Mother Dearest tried to rip me a new asshole for flaunting my homosexual tendencies. When it did not affect me, she went after Jordan. Scared him good.”

“Of course she did.”

“He wanted me to do something about it. But what the hell could I do? She’s my mother. I can’t get rid of her. I either putup with or ignore her bigotry. Besides, Father’s the one who pulls the legal end of the inheritance, so as long as he doesn’t care, I don’t care. Jordan, though… he couldn’t understand that. He was convinced Mother would make our lives hell. Jordan left that kind of environment when he was a teenager, you know.”

“I didn’t, no.”

“Well, he did. Made quite a name for himself after college, but he got there by the skin of his teeth. Was homeless for a while. Only reason he didn’t end up on the absolute bottom rung of society was because he found a spot in a shelter for homeless LGBT youth. Helped him graduate high school and go off to live in a dorm at college. Rest is history, I guess.”

“I had no idea.”

“So, when Mother started behaving that way toward us, Jordan panicked. I didn’t take his concerns seriously enough. He was overwhelmed and broke up with me. Blah blah blah, your big heartbroken brother self-medicated with sex and other unhealthy addictions, got cleaned up and determined to turn his life around, and here came Jordan at a conference we happened to attend.”

“I remember that part.”

“Yup. We were back in bed that night.” Ted clears his throat. I don’t even flinch. “Been together since. If that’s not a sign that we’re meant to be together, then I don’t know what is. Decided to make an honest man out of him and show Mother that I was serious.”

“And nowsheself-medicates.”

“She’s always done that.” He sighs, body sagging in his tailored tux. “The point is that I didn’t reassure him that he needed to know that a relationship between us could work. No amount of love or sexual attraction was enough in the end. People who have known that level of desperation and poverty will never relate tous on that level. Guess that’s okay, but we have to make it up to them in other ways if they’re the ones we want.”

Has this whole conversation been set up to give me advice? “Guess that’s where I failed, then. Alessa panicked and ran out on me. I can’t convince her to take me back. She says I get one more chance before I’m expected to leave her alone for the rest of her life.”

Ted kicks himself away from the windowsill. “Hope it works out for you, Jules. I like to think that you and I can break that vicious cycle our parents have been in since before we were born. Do you wanna be like Dad when we’re his age?”

“God, no. I’d like to think I have more self-control than that.”

“Ha!” Ted swings his arms toward the door with a grin the size of Texas on his face. “Yeah, I got that bug from him. And you’ve got Mom’s frigid face. But that doesn’t mean we have to become them, you know?”

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