Page 62 of Pucking Your Best Friend

“And, what about…sex?”

She choked, coughing up a piece of bread that landed on the counter. “What?” she croaked.

“Sex,” he repeated soberly, still looking at her, his eyes locking with hers with his hands propped on the kitchen island and his shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows so that she could see his sinewy forearms.

He seemed so calm and composed, while her heart was beating at triple speed.

“Um…well, ideally, he should want to have it with me,” she replied softly.

Matt chuckled softly and the warm, dark tones gave Maddie goosebumps. “Ideally, he should want to have it with me,” he repeated.

“I’ve been able to live without it for a long time and still be happy, Matt,” she whispered. “So, sex is not a priority in a relationship.”

He nodded slowly. “If that’s what you believe, thenweare in a relationship.”

She wrapped her fingers around the kitchen counter. “We are,” she confirmed quietly, and then added hesitantly, “Just not a sexual one.”

“Right. Not a sexual one,” he repeated as if he had to remind himself. As if he had to remind them both.

And, right then, it felt like they both needed a reminder.

Maddie’s neck was tingling. Her heart was pounding. And the heat in her stomach wasn't from the mustard on the sandwich.

“Don’t you miss it?” Matt asked, stepping around the kitchen island. He took only one slow step, but to Maddie, it seemed as if he was sprinting toward her. “Sex and everything that comes with it? The long, drawn-out kisses? The warmth of each other’s skin? Touches that grow more intimate and greedy with each second? The anticipation that consumes you and becomes increasingly urgent until you can’t think of anything else but fulfilling it? Don’t you miss being able to touch someone? To be able to explore as much as you want without anyone stopping you? Until you are part of each other for a moment.”

Matt was still looking at her, his pupils larger than before. He was allowing her to read his gaze.

She swallowed. How did he manage to turn her on without laying a finger on her? How could he trigger so many images with words alone?

She was unable to tear her eyes from him. Unable to control her breathing, which grew increasingly shallower and shallower. Unable to stop the blush that was surely creeping up her neck.

Her mouth went dry and one hand was still gripping the counter when she whispered, “I do…miss sex.”

She saw Matt tense his forearms. “Is that so?”

“Yes. I miss it. A lot.” It was the truth. Right now, in fact, she couldn’t think of anything else. “I miss feeling wanted. I miss…that I didn’t have to do it myself.” She swallowed, surprised by her words. “I miss the touches and everything that follows. And…” She bit her lip and inhaled deeply, knowing she was going too far and that they might not recover from these words. She couldn’t do anything otherwise, though. Her abdomen continued to tighten pleasantly with every passing moment—there was so much desire, so much heat, so much she wanted. And, why shouldn’t she take it? If only for today. And, if she chose to have a one-night stand, then let it be with Matt! She trusted him. And, God, shewantedhim right now.

“And?” he asked roughly.

“And…” she repeated and swallowed. “And, for weeks, I haven’t been able to think of anything but those handcuffs by your bed. And the fact that I want you to chain me to your damn headboard and do everything you said you would do a few days ago.”

Matt fell silent. His words, his posture, everything stopped short. Even time stopped.

“I guess you’re right,” he murmured, his hands clenched as if he was finding it difficult to control himself. “It doesn’t necessarily make it easier when you’re honest and tell the other person how you feel."

She laughed tensely. “No. Not really.”

Matt took a shuddering breath before muttering, “Maddie, what about finding Prince Charming?”

“I can look for him tomorrow.”

The corners of his mouth twitched. “If we do this, it’ll only be when we both understand…”

“That it’s a one-time thing, of course.” She swallowed. “We’re just both turned on and…helping each other.”

“Right. Because our friendship…”

“…is more important. Will always be more important,” she replied seriously. Because she knew he’d been afraid of that ever since he’d talked to her about Dax. “Someone will only get hurt unless we both understand what exactly this is about. But, we do. All I’m doing is saying ‘yes’ to something that’s just for me. You suggested that yourself. And…once won’t do any harm.”

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