Page 86 of The Art of Catching Feelings

“Well,” she said. “I did not know that.”

In the corner, there was a stack of luggage that Layla had referred to as herbaby bag. When Donovan had pointed out that it was singular for a reason, Layla had said that she had three separate birth plans and she needed to bring different items for each potential eventuality and if other people were as prepared as her, they’d have an entire luggage set, too. It was wild to Daphne, to think that in a couple of days her brother and sister-in-law would be going home with ababy, an actual human they’d take care of and who would bond them together for the rest of their lives.

“I didn’t want you to know,” Daphne said. “I couldn’t believe that there I was, barely a year after splitting with Justin, fucking up yet another relationship. And I really didn’t wantyouto know.”

Donovan pointed at his chest, like he was playing to the back-of-house in a school play. “Me? Why me?”

“You already think I’m such a failure for not making it work with Justin,” she said. “I know you took his side, and—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Donovan put the phone down and wiped his hands on his jeans before he held them up like he was actually trying to stop her words from hitting him. “I didn’t take Justin’s side. I mean, he’s my friend, yeah, but—”

“I know he’s your friend,” Daphne said. “And I don’t want to have ruined that, too. Believe me. But you’vealwaystaken his side. When you guys would hog the video game controllers. When you laughed at me the night of my prom. When I wanted to go on a honeymoon and Justin said we could use the money to buy into that flex Panthers tickets scheme and go to four home games as our honeymoon.”

“That was a good deal,” Donovan said. “And technically,fourweekends in Charlotte instead of just one week somewhere else.”

Daphne shrugged, likesee. He was still doing it.

“And laughed at you the night of your prom?” Donovan said. “I don’t remember that…”

But she could see the moment when hedidremember the way he and Justin had reacted when she came out in her dress and makeup. It was oddly satisfying, having that validation that it had really happened, that it wasn’t just something she’d made into a bigger deal over the years.

“I had no idea,” he said finally. “I didn’t know that was how you saw it. I’m sorry, Daphne.”

She was conscious suddenly of the setting, of the fact that they were sitting in a hospital room where Layla was hooked up to all kinds of monitors that beeped and spiked, and nurses kept coming and going outside the hallway. It wasn’t the time or place toadjudicate all her past insecurities. She could let Donovan off the hook.

“It’s fine,” she said.

“No,” he said. Donovan looked genuinely stricken. “I’m so sorry. I never meant to make you feel that way. When we were younger…sure, I was probably a dick sometimes. I saw it as typical big-brother stuff, just giving you a hard time. He was my friend and you were the annoying little sister, you know?”

“I know,” she said. “I’m sure Iwasannoying, always wanting to be underfoot. And it had to be painfully obvious what a crush I had on Justin.”

“Well, yeah,” Donovan said. “And if you want the truth, I didn’t like it at first. Not because I didn’t thinkyouwere good enough forhim, but because I knew damn well thathewasn’t good enough foryou. But once you guys got together, it seemed to make you both happy, so I had to make my peace with it. You’re your own person, you know? You can make your own decisions. And you’d decided you wanted him.”

“For better or worse,” Daphne muttered.

Donovan leaned forward on his chair, pressing his hands together almost like he was praying, like he was pleading with Daphne to hear him. “I was so close to saying something on your wedding day. Justin wassucha prick at the bachelor party”—here Layla made a face and nodded, as if it was important that she confirm that Justin was, in fact, a prick—“and I could justtellthat you were having second thoughts about it that morning. But you looked so beautiful in your dress, and there was that whole thing where they got the flowers wrong, and I couldn’t. When you told me you were getting a divorce, my first thought wasthank god. But I felt disloyal, because Justinisstill my best friend, for all his faults as a brother-in-law, and you’re my sister and I want you to be happy and you seemed miserable. So yeah, I tried to encourage you toget back together because I didn’t know what you wanted and I never wanted to be the one who was standing in the way of it.”

That was maybe the most Daphne had ever heard her brother say to her at once. He wasn’t the touchy-feely type, generally—if he signed a birthday card to her, he’d writeLove, Your Big Brother,but he wasn’t big on sayingI love youper se. But somehow that speech, the part where he’d said she looked beautiful in her wedding dress. It had felt damn close.

“Why is he still your best friend if he’s such a prick?” She realized that was the question she most wanted the answer to.

Donovan sighed. “I don’t know. It’s hard to make friends as an adult.”

“Well, join a book club or something. Take up archery.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Donovan said, brightening. Then, to make sure she understood: “The archery one, I mean.”

Daphne rolled her eyes. “I don’t know if you can be trusted with a bow and arrow. But I’d pay money to see you at a book club. A Nicholas Sparks one, maybe.”

“That reminds me,” Layla said from the bed. “What are your plans after the season, when you’re done with this sideline reporter gig?”

Briefly, Daphne thought back to a time when Chris had asked her the same question. When she’d thought he was asking because he saw a future with her in it, and he was trying to see if she saw it the same way. It hadn’t even occurred to her then to consider moving to take a similar job with another team, but who knew. Maybe that would be the best option for her. “I’m open to whatever,” she said. “Why? Do you know a similar job in another market that might take me?”

“What?” Layla said, so sharply Daphne briefly thought she must’ve said something wildly out of line. Like ofcourseshe wasn’t just going to land the equivalent of Layla’s job somewhereelse. That was a lot of hubris after she’d only been doing half duty for the past four months. She started to backpedal, say something about how she was only kidding, but just then a nurse came in.

“Hello!” she said in a chirpy voice that Daphne immediately knew Layla was inwardly flinching from. “Just here to check Mom’s dilation.”

It was weird to Daphne, to hear Layla referred to as “Mom,” but she guessed she’d have to get used to it.

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