Page 21 of Caught Up

“I did it to protect her.”

“How could that have possibly protected her?” he demanded.

“Better people think she was living in a fantasy world than that we actually hooked up.”

“I call bullshit,” he said. “You threw her to the fucking wolves because you didn’t want to be part of the drama.”

Now I was getting pissed. I threw her to the fucking wolves because they were better than the lion waiting behind a nearby tree. If only Alec knew how far our father had been willing to go back then, how farherfather had been ready to go right along with him. They’d been gearing up for someRomeo and Juliet–style shit, and I’d done what I had to do to stop them.

I’d kept it all to myself back then, not just to protect Lauren, but to protect my brothers from the reality that our father was an even bigger monster than they realized. And I wasn’t ready to come clean now, because I was still grappling with how to break free from Dad and had no idea how to tell my brothers they were about to be on their own with him. Instead, I settled for ahalf-truthto get Alec off my back.

“That’s not what happened,” I said, forcing myself to stay calm. “You’ve seen all the shit Mom’s been through because of Dad. Because of us. Everyone at school freaking out about Lauren proved that any woman I ended up with would be put through the same hell. I cared about her too much to do that to her.”

I cared about her so much that I’d broken both our hearts to keep her safe.

Alec’s expression shifted into reluctant understanding. “Fine, but you still could have come clean after everything died down and she transferred schools, just to clear her name.”

I nearly groaned. “Jesus, I get it. You think I still owe her an apology.”

“Yeah, you do,” he said. “You owe that woman the fucking world. You owe that woman the favor of all favors. If you want a second chance with her, you better be willing to do whatever it takes to gain her forgiveness.”

Getting lectured by my younger brother. What had my life come to? “Look, whatever does or doesn’t happen between me and Lo is none of your goddamn business.”

I expected Alec to snap back, or at least make some snarky comment, but his expression was sober in the lamplight. “Hey, why don’t you get out of here? The hole is deep enough. Just help me lower the box down, and I can fill the rest in myself.”

I eyed him. Where was this coming from? The sudden topic change was suspicious as hell, and it made me wonder if he was serious about his conspiracy theory bullshit. “You’re not going to try and open it as soon as I’m out of sight, are you?”

He shuddered. “Fuck, no. We learned that lesson five years ago.”

A memory tried to float to the surface, but I squashed it down, back into the black pit of ugly things in the bottom of my psyche that I worked real hard to suppress. “Then why?”

Alec broke our gaze and set his shovel aside. “You still call her Lo.”

I shook my head. “Don’t read into it. This isn’t some love story. This is about scratching aten-year-olditch.”

He ambled over to the box. “Whatever you say.”

“I’m serious,” I told him, following in his wake. “Ijustexplained why that romantic shit isn’t in the cards for me.”

He leaned down and grabbed his side of the box. I followed suit, and together, we hefted it aloft. The fucking thing was well over a hundred pounds, an outrageous amount considering it was barely larger than the box my motorcycle helmet came in. The sounds of our grunts and cursing drowned out the nearby crickets as slowly, carefully, we lowered it in. I pulled half the muscles in my back by the time it was finally in place, and I could tell from the way my shirt clung to me that I was freely bleeding. At this rate, I would never heal.

Alec straightened with a groan, his hands on his hips. At least I wasn’t the only one in pain. He turned to me with a grimace. “Why don’t you think you’re worthy of love, Nic?”

“Fucking hell,” I ground out, spinning away.

“Because you should know that you are,” he continued, and I couldhearthe grin in his words. “Worthy of love.”

Only the threat of being overheard by a nosy camper kept me from hitting him with my shovel. I’d have to find some way to pay him back for this later, but for now, I was taking him up on his offer and leaving him out here to finish the job on his own. Dad kept saying I needed to trust Alec with more responsibility, and here was his first test.

“Don’t get eaten by a bear before you’re done,” I told him.

“But afterward is fine?” he asked in mock outrage.

“After is perfect,” I called over my shoulder. “And if you say anything to Dad about Lauren, I’ll tell him about that mistake you made last year.”

“You wouldn’t,” he hissed.

I threw him the middle finger and kept on walking.

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