“Why is it wrong, Ma? Why is it so bad to be friends with someone who went through exactly the same thing I did? Who knows exactly how I feel.”
Bright that my mother was, she cut through the BS. “Is it only friendship?”
“It was a business association, if you need to know. I wasn’t interested in telling Aakash this, but I’ve been helping Sujit look for a place for a new project he has in the works.”
“In one ofourbuildings?” Mom’s eyes bugged out. “Beta, that is abaddecision. Averybad decision. You know you won’t be able to hide it from Satish forever.”
“I’m not trying to hide anything,” I lied again, this time struggling against both guilt and shame. I was trying to hide every single emotion I felt for Sujit from my family.
The gratitude I felt toward the universe for its kindness seemed to be dissipating fast.
“And when your father learns?”
“I learned to deal with this whole situation, didn’t I? Maybe others can too,” I cried, bitter from fighting the constant battle. “And did he tell you he was talking about my marriage without consulting me? Did you talk to him about that?”
Mom sighed in consolation. “I did, Beta. I didn’t know, and when he told me, I asked him to stop. But you should cut him some slack, my darling. You know Satish took it the hardest. He stood up on that stage and declared to the world that he trusted Sameer. It was more than hurt for him. He believes Sameerbesmirched his name, his trust. He lost face because now it was for the world to see his error in judgement.”
“I know, Ma. I understand.”
“And you have been his pride and joy. He is deeply angry for you. He knows how much you are hurting, and he’s not inclined to forgive that family in this lifetime at least.”
“But what does Sujit have to do with any of this? Isn’t he also the injured party like me?”
“Yes, Beta, but he was Tara’s boyfriend. He’s already tainted by association in his eyes.”
“Ma, he consoled me when I was at my weakest. I sat across from him and promised that I’d help him find a space for his new project, and I am not going back on my word.”
Mom sighed in defeated resignation and ran a hand over her forehead. “You are khuddar like your father.”
“But this is more than self-respect and honor, Ma. This is about giving him his due respect too. I was in very bad shape when I came here, you know that. I am in a better place now because of him. I am just repaying his kindness like he deserves.”
“Oh, Beta!” Mom sighed.
“Am I wrong, Ma?”
“No, my darling, but make sure it’s only kindness and nothing else.”
“What else could it be?” My lies had gotten significantly bolder over the course of this short conversation.
My perceptive mother dropped the subject and consoled me instead. “You will find comfort and love again, Aarti. You don’t have to go looking for it immediately. Take your time to heal. Become your old self again, and you will see I am right.”
I nodded. I wasn’t going to argue with her, especially when every word out of her mouth was the truth. I was also very tired. I had just spent the most wonderful evening with an incredibleman and now I was working hard to lay it on thick how much he didn’t mean to me.
Perhaps it was the cumulative effect of it all—the excessive workload, the emotional turmoil, and the blatant lies I had been feeding my family—that I took to bed that week.
I had set aside Thursday afternoon to show Sujit the space I had earmarked for him. But I woke up with a high fever. I took acetaminophen and slept through most of the morning, but when I woke up around noon, the fever persisted. The sheets were damp from my sweat and I was now shivering between them. I texted Sujit to cancel our appointment.
He called back promptly.
“You’re not well? What happened?”
“Nothing serious. It’s just a mild fever. I should be better by tomorrow,” I said, but my teeth chattered so hard, he heard it. He also noted my broken voice.
“I’ll be right over,” he said and hung up before I could protest.
I didn’t know how long he took to arrive because the fever had knocked me out again. When I heard the bell chiming, I unlocked the door using my phone.
He rushed in and put a hand on my forehead.