Page 73 of Stutter

“No.”

“Could you tell the difference between your shadow and Riordan?”

She nods. “And you… a-and Mmmaverick.”

My chin inclines once in understanding and instead of writing down what I want to, which is that ‘patient has a hypervigilance sense to danger… possibly a conditioned response stemmed from childhood,’ I simply ask, “Did your shadow ever… appear while you were at Lorne Wood?”

She squints as if trying to remember but shakes her head. Her hands fly up.I was lost a lot in my mind. Always foggy. And I was drugged to sleep during lightning storms.

I growl. “You werewhat?”

You would leave for the evening or the weekends, and when there were storms, I was sedated… pretty much until you returned.

My guts churn, a vile sickness sweeping through me. There wasneverany mention of meds or new meds on her charts when I would return to work in the mornings. And I workedeveryday. I didn’t show my face at the institution every day, but I checked her charts and watched her through the camera feedsevery day.

Under my very watchful eye, Raven hadn’t been sedated by me unless extremely necessary. And even then, those were very far and very few times in between. When she first transferred to my ward, she had just had multiple surgeries, her leg was still in a cast, and she was bandaged everywhere else. When I stepped into her room, she was bent in a V position half hanging off the bed as though she had tried to crawl her way out before the medicine took effect and she was a drooling mess. Her used-to-be chocolate and caramel highlights all over in tangled tresses. It took a day of me brushing them out so the orderlies could tie it back.

I will admit – I did not love her then. No. My curiosity for her grew over time and the more I watched her, the more Iobsessed, the more I grew attached, like she were a missing limb of mine and the more my need for her grew. I understood so much about her that I became hyperaware of her. Every twitch, every blink, every side-eye, every sharp inhale, every tear, everything that is Raven Olivia Monroe is embedded in my mind like an inoperable brain tumor and that’sexactlyhow I want it. I will never rid myself of her and she will never escape me.

“Do you trust me?”

She nods without hesitation.

“I never gave the order to dope – to have yousedatedunless I was the one pushing the needle into your vein, Little Bird. Even then, it was small doses because the more clarity you had, the better I was able to get to know you. Do not ever think I would ever harm you.”

“I d…don’t.”

“No. You’re just upset because I won’t fuck your throat.” I come full circle.

She smirks.

“Come here, kneel before me.”

She gets up, strides to me in ten short steps, and kneels before me.

“Good girl. Undo my belt, unfasten my slacks, and take me out. I want to grow in your mouth,” I order.

She obeys and I let out a soft hiss when her cool fingers tentatively wrap around my thickening length. I shove away her hair from her face and hold it in my hand, tangling my fingers in the silky strands.

“Mon Coeur,”my heart,“if I am ever too gentle with you it’s because I treasure you. Even when I have you bent over, ramming myself into your sweet cunt, sharing you or calling you filthy names, je t’adore.”I adore you. “I want to own your orgasms, your pleasure, and looking at you when you come for me is whatI live for. Mine doesn’t matter. Even when I dream of your lips wrapped around me,” she swirls her tongue around the crown of my cock, licking up a pearl of my pre-cum already accumulating, pulling me in and sucking on my tip like it’s a pacifier while wiggling her tongue on my frenulum, driving mecrazy already. “Likethat, Amourette, I still prefer to see you a whimpering mess beneath or above me, watching your face contort in pure pleasure and agony and love and desire. Forme.” I rasp.

Using her hair I tug her lower, pumping my hips to feel her gag around me but she swallows, her cheeks hollowing on every retreat to suck me deeper and I stand so I can fuck her pretty little face properly.

“Your every wish is my command, Little Bird. All you have to do… is open your slutty lips and I’ll grant it.” I push forward until I reach the back of her throat, cupping the side of her face and keep her there until she relaxes around me and then I thrust, deeper, hold. I pull away until it’s just the tip of me and do it again, losing myself to the way she gags and slurps her saliva. So sloppy, so messy, it runs down her chin, but my good little slut doesn’t give up, doing her best to swallow and relax and hold her breath only for me to plunge again and again, watching her eyes water and spill over.

My balls feel so heavy when her hand comes up to cup them, tugging, making them draw up, my lower spine heating, my balls tingling. Her index finger finding that sweet spot behind my sac and pressing. “Is this what you wanted, Amourette? Twisted little bird wants my seed down her throat?”

She moans a resoundingmmmhmm! Practicallysquealingin delight like my perfect little cumslut and the vibrations travel up my cock, adding to my pleasure.

“Jerk the base, so good, Raven, so fucking good. A little goddess at my feet, look at you. Beautiful,beautifullittle bird. I’m going to… oh, fuck… just a pretty girl… yes… yes.. oh fuck. Gonna make you take me… deeper. Hold your breath. Oh fuck,Raven!”I shove every fucking inch of my dick past her tonsils, curling over her and a torrent of my hot, thick cum spurts to the back of her velvety throat, contracting around me to drink every fucking drop I give her, humming in absolute delight. My vision blurs and my thighs tremble from the force of my orgasm still receding when I pull out of her slick, hot mouth and fall back. She follows, lapping up whatever she missed like a hungry kitten and I jerk when shelicks the head of my cock, overly sensitive and so, so sweetly does she tuck me back in my slacks and then climbs into my lap.

I’m panting, clutching her to me and I kiss her temple. “You are… everything to me, little love.Everything. If you had been transferred out of my care and into another asylum, I would have followed you there without a second thought for merely a glimpse of you. No metal doors or barred or even locked windows could have kept me from you. Which I’ve proven to you already. I would have found a way in even if it meant admitting myself under voluntary hold.” And then, because I mean it, I say, “When this is over, I will do my best to love you out loud.” And then I promise, “I will do my best to tell you the thoughts that swirl in my mind when it comes to us, but Amourette,” she pulls away to look at me, plush lips still swollen. “You have to tell me what’s going on in your pretty head, too. You have to remember I will always look for clues as to what’s bothering you but I’m not in your head. You have to talk to me.”

“I’m sc-scared this is… a dream.” She whispers, tears gathering in her eyes.

I tug at her wrist and softly rub on her fresh tattoo, feeling the raised ink marring her pretty flesh. Seeing my name on her body fuels me with a deeper desire to have her come for me so I can watch her face screw up in total ecstasy. “Even in your nightmares, your dreams, your hallucinations, my love for you is the realest thing. Cling to that every time you feel lost, and I’ll always find a way for you to come back to me.”

“Jus..t d-don’t tr..eat me… like… I’m frag…ile.”

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