Page 35 of Worth the Wait
Me: I still feel it, Jackson. And that terrifies me more than anything.
His response comes immediately, as if he's been waiting.
Jackson: What exactly are you afraid of, Tarryn?
Such a simple question. Such a complicated answer. I curl deeper into my couch cushions, pulling a throw blanket over my lap as I consider how to respond.
Me: Losing myself.
Me: Losing everything I've worked for. Losing you again.
The vulnerability of the admission makes my chest tight. I've spent years building walls, constructing a version of myself that's invulnerable to the kind of heartbreak I experienced atnineteen. Now I'm dismantling those defenses with every word I send.
Three dots appear, then:
Jackson: What if I promised you wouldn't lose any of those things?
I laugh softly but it’s tinged with melancholy.
Me: Can you really promise that? We both know how easily promises are broken.
His reply takes longer this time, each passing second stretching my nerves tighter.
Jackson: No. I can't promise that. But I can promise to be honest this time. No more pride. No more hiding behind excuses.
I reply, asking the question that cuts to the heart of my fear.
Me: And what if it's not enough?
Jackson: Then at least we'll know we tried. That we were brave enough to find out.
Brave. The word resonates through me, stirring something that's lain dormant for years. When did I stop being brave? When did I start choosing safety over possibility?
I respond, my last defense against what I truly want.
Me: We work together.
Me: It's complicated.
Jackson: Life is complicated, Tar. Doesn't mean we stop living it.
I chew my lip nervously. Then I finally reply.
Me: I need time.
Me: Time to figure out what I want. What I'm willing to risk.
Jackson: Fair enough. I've waited eight years. I can wait a little longer.
I stare at those words, feeling the weight of them—the patience, the understanding, the quiet certainty that what lies between us is worth waiting for.
Me: Thank you. For understanding. And Jackson?
Jackson: Yes?
Me: I'm glad you're here. Even if it complicates everything.
Three dots appear, disappear, then another message appears.
