Page 58 of Nova

17

Nova

It's been a few days since the shit show took place at Twisted Throttle, and I'm still unsettled with the fact Piper's mom wants back in her life after all these years. Madison and her old man, along with the other few members who were with them the other day, are still in town. Part of that has to do with how they're searching for their ex-member as much as we are. I'm beginning to think he's left town because there has been no sighting of his sorry ass on the streets.

Sipping my coffee, I sit out here on my back deck, looking out over the water, and the dense fog hovering above it. I love mornings like this, where the bayou is hidden amongst the mist. The world around me becomes quiet and still—the kind of peace a man needs to think. My thoughts drift back to when I arrived back home after leaving the bar the other night, and Piper was locked away in her room. She didn't want to talk much about seeing her mom. So, I did the only thing I could do—held her while she softly cried. My daughter is not a crier, but that night she did. Years of hurt she's never shown before poured from her as she wept, while I stroked her hair.

I wish I could rid her of the turmoil she must be feeling. If my embrace could fix the hurt, or extinguish the anger inside her, I would hold her forever if that meant I could shield her and protect her from life's disappointments. Hearing the door open, then close behind me, pulls me from my thoughts. Looking back over my shoulder, I see Piper. "Hey, Bean."

She rounds the corner of the outdoor sectional, sitting beside me with a mug of warm tea in her hands. "Good morning, Daddy." Piper sighs, slowly looking out at the water. We sit quietly for a few minutes. Just the two of us enjoying the silence only a bayou morning can bring. "Daddy?" she finally speaks softly.

"Yeah?" I down what remains of my coffee, then set the mug on the table in front of me. Leaning back, I drape my arm across the back of the wicker sofa.

"Does it make me a horrible person if I say that I'm not ready—to meet her?"

"No, baby girl." It breaks my heart that she would even think such a thing. There isn't a mean bone in Piper's body. Not vindictive or purposeful anyway. "You'll know when the time is right."

Her eyes fall to the mug in her hands. "What if that never happens? What if it never feels like the right time?"

"Come here." I motion for her to scoot closer. When she does, I wrap my arm around her, kissing the top of her head. "I can't answer that for you, Bean. You're the only one with that answer. The only advice I can give is that your heart will know. Give it time. When it speaks, listen."

Silence falls between us again.

"I see her when I look in the mirror now," Piper states. "Her heart-shaped face, long brown hair. Everything about me reflects her image—all but my eyes." My daughter turns her head to look at me with eyes like my own. "Those I got from you." The smile gracing her beautiful face is small, but it speaks louder than her words. It lets me know even though she's struggling right now, she's okay.

I smile back. "You're beautiful, Piper. Just as your mother is, but so much more. The kind-hearted person you are makes your light, and beauty shine brighter than hers ever did. You got the better part of both of us. Don't compare yourself to her, or me," I tell her. "You are one of a kind, baby girl. It's not about who you look like. It's who you are on the inside."

"Part of me hates the fact I see her likeness in myself. Another part of me feels this tug—a pull deep inside my..." Piper stops herself from saying more and leaves her sentencing hanging.

I pull in a deep breath. "It's okay to want to know your mom, Bean. Is that what you're struggling with?"

It takes her a moment to reply to my question, which is fine. I'll wait. She can have all the time she requires. I'm just happy that she is finally opening up to me. I was grateful she confided in Promise yesterday, but I must admit, I'm delighted she's coming to me now. "Kind of—yeah. Even though for most of my life I haven't given it too much thought, not having a mom I mean, I didn't realize just how much it actually bothered me until it—until she was right there in front of me," Piper confesses, and I feel the weight of her words.

"I'm not goin' to sugarcoat how I feel about your mom. I was angry for her actions all those years ago, and I'm fightin' mad now that she wants to be apart of someone's life she gave up on, regardless of her reasons." My voice hardens with anger over the situation. Breathing in, I calm my inner turmoil. "But those are my issues, not yours. I'm always here for you, Bean. I'll support any decision you make regarding your mom." I fight against the rage swirling in my gut because Piper doesn't deserve to see that from me. Especially now.

Sitting together, we watch the fog lift from the surface of the water, revealing a large Heron, perched upon a broken tree stump protruding above the waterline. Both of us keep whatever thoughts we have to ourselves.

Piper breaks the silence. "I'm blessed, Daddy. And so grateful that you never gave up on me. I don't know what choices I'll make when it comes to my mom, but right now," she pauses, "my life is full. I'm happy, and I know without question that I am loved." Piper lays her head against my shoulder, and I hug her tighter. "I love you, Daddy."

Damn. Piper got me all choked up. Taking a moment to absorb what she said, I pull in a few cleansing breaths and respond. "I'm the one who is blessed, baby girl." I kiss the top of her head once more. "I love you past the moon and beyond the farthest star."

Piper smiles at what I used to say when tucking her into bed at night when she was little.

The back-door creaks open and Promise pokes her head out. "Hey."

"Hey,"

"Mind if I join you two?" she asks.

"Bring your pretty ass over here," I pat the spot on the other side of me, and she walks out in a white summer dress that floats around her bare feet as she pads across the deck, then settles in beside me, tucking her body close to mine.

The three of us sit together, content with being in the moment, and I couldn't ask for anything more than what I have right now.

Later that afternoon,with time to myself, I attempt to work on the piece I need to finish for Logan. A phone call from Kiwi halts my progress before it even starts. "What's up?"

"We have a situation."

My body becomes rigid. "I'm listening." Placing my tools down, I walk outside.

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