Page 10 of Drunk Dialing My Enemy

“Sure.”

“So the fact that I was inexperienced was a problem? I wasn’t any good?”

“No!”

“Then what?” I ask him in exasperation.

I can’t figure out what the hell Darren means. Or what he wants. Which is fitting, because it’s always been this way. I’ve never quite understood what we were. Were we even friends? Did he like that kiss, or hate it? If he hated it, why did he even do it? Why was it such a long, breath-stealing, spine-tingling kiss?

“You were so innocent, Katie. So sweet. And I didn’t want to ruin you with my shit.”

“What do you mean?”

“My damage or whatever.”

“Darren, I don’t know what you mean. What damage?”

He gives me an odd look and I wonder if I’m missing something obvious. Maybe hangovers are kind of like being drunk, making you misunderstand what’s going on.

“Has Dot never told you about our parents?”

“I…no?” I have no idea what Darren could be talking about. I think of Mr. and Mrs. Baker. I knew Mrs. Baker more than Mr. Baker, since she was a stay at home mom for most of Dot’s childhood.

She was the one to give us a ride to the mall or help us paint our fingernails. She made the best chocolate chip cookies I’ve ever had and now Dot does too, something I’m incredibly jealous of.

Even though Dot shared the secret family recipe with me – saying I’m as good as family to her, so I deserve to have the recipe, too – I’ve tried to recreate the delicious cookies so many times to no success.

Mr. Baker was always busy. Sometimes he seemed stressed out and withdrawn, but I assumed it was because of his job as a cardiovascular surgeon, which always seemed to have him working long, unpredictable hours at the hospital.

“If Dot hasn’t told you about this, I don’t know if I should,” Darren says slowly. “But…fuck it. I want you to know. Because Iwant you, Katie. So I need to tell you the truth. My dad is a piece of shit. Okay? He sucks.”

“What?”

I’m shocked by the bitterness and anger in Darren’s voice. Even in the worst of our exchanges since he bought my business’s building, when I was sure he hated my guts, he’s never spoken like this before.

“He would put on the act of the hard-working father and husband,” Darren continues. “But he was cheating on our mom the whole time. And those times he said he was at medical conferences or doing emergency surgery? He was meeting one of his mistresses.”

“You’re not like him, Darren,” I tell him.

He looks at me.

“I know that now,” he says quietly. “But when it all came to light, it was hard. It wasn’t just that he betrayed my mom. He betrayed all of us. All of those lies. This guy he pretended to be, but wasn’t. I was seventeen when I found out and I told them to keep it from Dot until she was older. She was already struggling enough in school with her ADHD and stuff. This would have derailed everything.”

I nod. I remember my good friend’s challenges in school very well.

“I was still processing it all when we kissed on your birthday,” Darren continues. “And when we did that, I felt so fucking free.Whileit was happening. Then it was over, and I went home that night and listened to my parents fighting upstairs. They were in marriage counseling. Trying to get past the infidelity. I listened from the stairs and thought about how these people were once my picture of an ideal life. How my father, just months ago, was my model of what a man should be. How could I have been so wrong? And what else could I be wrong about, if I was wrong about him?”

“You weren’t wrong. He was your dad. You had no reason to distrust him. And even with all of that, I think you became a good man. You didn’t become like him.”

He looks at me, a tortured expression in his eyes.

“I’d never do that to you,” he says. As though he’s trying to convinceme.

Convince me that he’d never cheat on me. We’re not even together – are we? – but here he is, vowing to be loyal to me.

“I know,” I say. “Of course I know that.”

CHAPTER 6

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