Page 10 of Possessive Cowboy

“See what?”

“See how powerful you are,” she says. “Powerful enough to change your life. Powerful enough to set your mind to things, to decide on what you want, and then to get it.”

“Well,” I say slowly. “I guess last night was a good step in the right direction…I decided I needed a night of hot sex. And that’s exactly what I got.”

Abby bounces in her seat a little, a ball of energy even on a Sunday morning after a late night. I envy her spirit, her energy, most of all her optimism.

“That’s more like it,” she says, leaning forward. “So…go on. Tell me all the details. I have to knoweverything.”

6

Maverick

It’s a brutal Monday morning.Last night we got frost. Frost this time of the year isn’t unheard of, but it’s unusual enough that I wasn’t prepared.

My fault. My responsibility. Being prepared for anything is the only way to survive this life. You don’t let yourself be caught off guard. Always have supplies on hand. Always be ready.

Ever since I hooked up with Bridget, my mind has been all fucked up. Even Levi has noticed, and that guy doesn’t notice shit unless it’s right in front of him.

“Hey. I have a question. Don’t take it the wrong way though.”

I raise a brow at him. We’re in his stable, just finishing up with the horses. This is how we work; as neighbors, it’s customary to look out for one another. That’s how it is in the country. You don’t have a lot of people nearby. So you make friends with your neighbors. You do them favors, with the understanding that they’ll repay you eventually. It’s the way of life out here.

Today Levi called in a favor of his own, asking me to help feed the horses, clean out their hooves from the mud, and get the blankets ready for nightfall.

If it’s going to be an early winter, that means we have to start preparing now.

“What’s your question?” I ask.

“Why are you so fucking stupid lately?”

“Thanks, man. No way I could take a question like that the wrong way.”

Levi grunts in response, his back to me as he tends to a horse in the farthest stall.

“You know what I mean by stupid. Don’t get your panties in a wad,” Levi says eventually. “You’re forgetful. You’re slipping up, and you know it. Hell, I hardly have time to take care of my own chores, with as often as you’ve been calling me to bail you out of whatever mess you’re in.”

“I’m fine,” I say.

“Bullshit,” Levi says. “You’ve got something going on in that head of yours. I’m not going to sit here and play the shrink. In fact I’d rather not know what kind of twisted up shit you’ve got going on in your mind. I just need you to sharpen up. You’re not you lately, and I need you on your game if we’re going to partner on a business together.”

“I’m on my game,” I answer.

In truth though? I’m not.

When Levi brought the idea of the food co-op to me a few months ago, I was all for it. I need the supplemental income if I’m ever going to be able to hire a ranch hand, and it sounded like minimal effort for maximum reward.

But that was before. Before Bridget came into my life and showed me how empty and lonely it is.

Now I’m not sleeping right, can’t eat, can’t get my chores done around the ranch. By the end of the day I’m tired. Not the kind of bone tired exhausted that I’ve become accustomed to, thanks to working the ranch on my own since my good for nothing brother Tex left me here alone.

No. That’s a kind of tired that I can deal with. I can pull through that kind of exhaustion, the kind that only permeates your muscles and bone, the kind that’s purely physical. All I have to do is shut my brain off, that voice that says “you’re tired, you should stop”, and keep my tired, aching body in motion.

But now?

Now mymindis tired. My mind and my heart.

I didn’t realize how fucking lonely I was until that night with Bridget. She was supposed to be a quick roll in the hay, a hookup to get the sex urges out of my system so that I could go through another cold, quiet winter without the comfort of a woman by my side.

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