Page 41 of Brutal Alpha

“I hate concussed me,” I said into my cupped hands. “She’s so embarrassing.”

“You also said that you got over it because I was an asshole,” Ethan offered, and I choked out an embarrassed laugh.

“Was I wrong?” I asked.

“No.”

We lapsed into silence again. I pushed the mostly-demolished plate of veggies toward him, and he took a stick of cucumber, bringing it straight to his mouth without even dipping it in the ranch, like a psychopath.

“The funny thing is, though,” he said. “I do remember some things about that visit. You uh—you came downstairs one morning with your hair up in a ponytail.” It was the morning after he’d told me I was a burden; it wasbecausehe’d told me I was a burden, but he didn’t need to know that. He looked suddenly vulnerable in the afternoon sun as he confessed, “It was like I’d—I don’t know, like I’d never seen your whole face before; you were so beautiful. I remember thinking that you were going to be a problem.”

His voice was soft, and the moment felt dangerous, so I did the only thing I could ever think to do when faced with danger: crack a joke.

“You perv,” I said. “I was seventeen.”

“Trust me, I was aware,” he said ruefully. “Lock me up.”

He offered me his wrists, ready to be handcuffed, and I snorted an ugly, undignified laugh. He smiled, and my heart gave a traitorous leap. I couldn’t afford that now. For all that I could see, he was trying to make things easier between us, but I was about to throw a major spanner in the works. I imagined telling him the truth, could see as clear as day the way his face would fall and anger would cloud his expression. I could hear him asking me why, telling me it was impossible, and asking me what he was supposed to do with a baby.

The laugh died in my throat, and I watched his face fall as he registered my distress.

“Sorry. I’m tired,” I said, able to think of no better excuse.

“Julia—” his voice followed me out of the room and up the stairs, but I couldn’t turn back. I slammed the door of my bedroom behind me, only just in time. Then I was alone, and the tears came.

Chapter 18 - Ethan

The buzz of the radio distorted my Beta’s voice, but the message was clear enough: come home.

“Loud and clear, Will,” I said. “With you in two days.”

“Roger that. Over and out.”

The radio clicked off, and that was that. We were going home. My Pack needed me, like it would until the day I died. So much had happened since I’d left, and yet it felt like no time had passed at all, or that everything had happened in some kind of alternate dimension. Nothing had felt quite real since Julia moved that first shadow on the night of the Solstice, but now reality was catching up to us.

Telling Julia it was time to go home felt like shattering the glass that had surrounded us. We’d been so hemmed in, so pushed together, that the thought of our imminent separation felt wrong—not that I planned on telling her that.

Maybe I should tell her. She’d get a kick out of it, at least. Despite the excitement of her developing magic, Julia had been strange and distant since we arrived on Ensign. At first, I’d put it down to exhaustion following her near-collapse on the bridge, but she’d been eating well and getting plenty of rest since then, and she only trained with Eve a few hours each day, seeming in good enough spirits then.

I had a nagging suspicion it was something I’d done, despite the fact that I’d been making a concerted effort not to piss her off. I tried to tell myself that if she had a problem, then that was on her, but my wolf was having none of it. He pawed and whined to be with her, to make sure she was alright, and I struggled more than ever to resist the urge.

At the very least, the news that we would be returning home gave me an excuse to check in on her. While I doubted she would be happy to leave Eve and her training behind, she might be pleased to get back to Caleb, Alyssa, and the twins, eager to return home where she could roam freely without needing a chaperone.

One of the few places she didn’t need a chaperone on Ensign was Xander’s backyard, and that was where I found her, sitting in the dappled shade of a tree in the early evening light, playing with the shadows cast by its branches. The yard was secluded, ringed by dense pine trees, and she looked small and delicate compared to the looming foliage.

“Ow!” I whirled around, trying to find the source of the sudden, sharp pain in my left buttock. Was it a wasp? A horsefly? It wasn’t burning or itching like an insect bite.

“Hey.” Julia waggled her fingers at me, and a sharp-looking shadow did the same. It was incredibly creepy, and yet I couldn’t help smiling.

“Very funny,” I said, rubbing my injured ass cheek as I approached her.

“I thought so,” she agreed. It looked like she wanted to continue, to make some joke at my expense, but then she bit her lip, holding herself back.

With no other route of conversation, I could only say,

“We need to go home.”

The shadow snapped back to its natural form.

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