Page 22 of The Outlaw's Code

“Off and on. He thought they were off, but I guess they’ll be back on soon enough.”

“Uh-huh…” Levi eyed me up and down. “And? How are you taking it?”

“What are you talking about?” I shrugged. “Why would I care about Calder and Vanessa getting back together? Good for them.”

“Shane.” Levi stared over at me. “You know I’ve known you since we were kids, right? Which means I can tell when you’re lying, too.”

“Did you bring anything to drink?” I sidestepped his question, my chest suddenly aching. “I could really use something strong right about now.”

Levi produced a bottle of bourbon he’d been keeping behind his back. “I’ve got you, Shane. Always.”

We passedthe bottle back and forth between us, sharing quiet swigs. I couldn’t think of anything to say, but I was grateful for the company. The pain in my chest hadn’t gone away, but it was much more manageable with someone else around, my attention focused on Levi instead. Levi had been looking over at me every so often, like there was something on his mind.

“What? What is it?” I pressed. “I can tell you’re thinking something. Just spit it out.”

“It’s just…” Levi hesitated. “I don’t know. I’m just shocked, that’s all.”

“Shocked about what?”

“I don’t know. Everything felt like it was lining up…”

“And by everything you mean me and Calder?” I scoffed. “That wasn’t real, Levi. It wasn’t anything.”

“You don’t believe that, Shane.”

“Maybe I don’t know what I believe anymore.” I shook my head. “Nothing… nothing makes sense to me right now.”

“Are you still thinking about getting your own land?”

“Yep. Why?”

“What do you see when you think about it?”

“What?”

“You know what I mean, Shane.” Levi took a swig of bourbon. “When you think about your dream coming true… are you still all alone?”

“Does it matter? Even if he’s all I can think about, it’s not like I can convince Calder to stay. He’s happy where he is.”

“You really think he’s happy with her? You said they were off and on,” Levi replied. “That doesn’t exactly sound like happily ever after to me.”

“I never should’ve done this to myself, Levi.” I let out a wounded laugh. “I don’t know what the hell I was thinking. Why would I let everything get tangled up like this?”

“You didn’tletanything happen to you, Shane. This is just what happens when you fall for—” Levi stopped himself, mid-sentence. “My point is that it can’t be helped.”

“So, what now? We just keep drinking until I forget all about him?”

“Actually…” Levi placed the bottle behind him on the couch. “I think we’ve both had enough. The room is starting to feel a little too hot.”

“The room’s getting a little wobbly, too,” I tried to joke, tried to ignore the pain in my chest.

“I’m sorry, Shane,” Levi started. “I know how it feels when you think you have something, someone. And then everything just… blows to pieces right in front of you.”

“I’ll be all right. I think.” I shrugged. “I was fine before Calder showed up. I could always go back to that.”

“Sure, you were fine. But were you actually happy?”

“Does it matter?” My voice was low. “As long as I’m getting by, the rest I can figure out as I go.”

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