Page 58 of Mischievous Lies

“And I can repeat that today if you like.” I can’t help the laugh that leaves me at his words as I hang up on him.

CHAPTER 35

Ivy

The next day, Billie pops over with a container of home-baked cookies. When I open it, I flip her off because she’s writtenSorry about your vagacross them with icing.

“He was freaking out about it. It only just went down,” she says, laughing at Hawke’s expense. I’m shaking my head because I’ve been working on one of my freelance jobs since I hung up on Hawke yesterday. I uncurl myself from the couch enough to eat one of the cookies because my vagina deserves it.

I had texted Billie about how much Hawke really needed a friend and that he’d had a hard-on because he was playing with Viagra. We’ve been messaging back and forth all day, even while she was at work. To be honest, I’d been waiting for an update to say he went to the hospital to have it taken care of. So when she explains that he called Ford yesterday afternoon after I left, freaking out that his dick had been erect for twelve hours, I’m a little surprised. Glad I gave my best efforts for eight of those hours.

I didn’t check back on the cameras when I woke up this morning. I just got straight to work, and then I fell back asleep. The situation wasn’t urgent enough for me, considering he inflicted it on himself. The dumbass.

“So did he go to the hospital?” I ask.

“No. Apparently, a stern talking from Eli with a gun to his head for exposing himself to Jewel as he frantically asked everyone what to do was enough to deflate him.”

My breath hitches, and then I keel over laughing. I roll on the couch, kicking my feet back and forth in hysterics. I wipe away tears. “He actually started showing everyone? That’s hilarious! I wish I would have been there to see Eli’s face. Oh my gosh! That’s the best!”

She laughs as she takes one of the cookies and looks at me pointedly. “But what I’m more interested in is something you’ve been avoiding. You said your vagina is sore in the messages, and he may have let it slip that you tried to help him. Care to explain?” I bite my lip as she waggles her brows. “You helped him?”

I exhale and take the final bite of my cookie as I stand up to make us some coffee. “I was there yesterday after you said he was having a rough day.”

“For what it’s worth, I had no idea what he was doing, and that was not what I was intending at all,” she clarifies.

“Well, Hawke does Hawke things.” I shrug as I put an espresso pod in the coffee machine. “But then I left him high and dry because my pussy was sore.”

She can’t stop laughing as she slaps her leg and joins me in the kitchen, leaning against the counter. “He was complaining about you and how it’s your fault.”

“It was not. I said he shouldn’t have taken that many.”

“Yeah, well, he clearly didn’t listen.” She shakes her head. “Apparently, he bought them from a guy at his gym, and I’m pretty sure he makes them himself, so Hawke was probably the first test dummy, and he should just be thankful his cock is still attached.”

“Oh my God! So they weren’t even legit ones?” I ask. He’s dabbling with homemade Viagra?

“I mean, I guess the dude works at a pharmacy if that counts for anything.”

“This is getting worse,” I tell her, trying not to smile. Fucking Hawke. He’s a big idiot.

“He literally thought he was going to die if his penis never worked again. He went to Eli’s house in a panic and called an emergency meeting, then when everyone arrived, he showed his junk and asked them why it wouldn’t go down.” She keeps laughing.

“I bet Eli wanted to kill him.” I can only imagine.

“Damn right,” she agrees. “Soooo, care to fill me in on what’s happening between you two now?”

“Nothing. I tried to help the situation, but when I got sore, I left.” I pass her the first coffee, and she glares at me.

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it. Stop avoiding the question, Ivy. Do you actually like him? There’s always been something between you two.”

I sigh. “Look, we fucked a few years back, okay?”

She slams her hand on the counter. “I fucking knew it!”

I try to hide my mischievous smile. “So, yeah, of course, I like Hawke, as unhinged as he is. He’s a good time. But Hawke and I don’t do anything past that.”

She seems not to like that answer. “Hmm. You both like to fuck around, everyone knows it. Do you think it could be something more? Or will you both still fuck around?”

“I’m not trying to marry him,” I sass, and she gives it back just as quickly.

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