Page 21 of Quest

“Correct, though without it our path ahead will prove much more challenging.” I gauged his reaction to this further complication—he had already demonstrated a sense of urgency in combating the curse before it could further tighten its hold over his kingdom, so this admission would deepen the test I’d laid out for him.

His noble determination momentarily faltered at my words before resolve hardened once more. “As unideal as the circumstances are, we must take the longer road, pressing forward regardless of the increased difficulties. Thank you for your honesty; you have given me much to think about.”

Though he concluded our conversation with a note of finality, I remained suspicious of the ease with which he had abandoned the idea, leaving me wondering if his hasty dismissal was merely a mask for his true sinister intentions.

Part of me yearned to investigate further to ensure that my test had indeed concluded in my favor. Yet beneath that practical need, a softer, more personal desire whispered—a longing to continue our conversation not just for insights into his character, but simply for the pleasure of his company. This thought surfaced unbidden, even without Lumis’ probing into my soul; I hastily suppressed it before it could take root.

He turned away, effectively ending our discussion, but my lingering confusion made the matter feel anything but resolved. “You’re truly not going to pursue an herb powerful enough to potentially save countless lives?”

The prince glanced back, expression solemn. “It is indeed a grave dilemma. The temptation to use every tool at our disposal is strong, especially when the stakes are as high as they are. Yet if we compromise our values for short-term gains, we risk losing more than we might save by eroding the very principles that define us.”

I could see the internal struggle reflected in his eyes as he earnestly grappled with the weight of the decision, rather than immediately seizing the opportunity for gain as I had anticipated. His response was not that of a man driven by greed or a disregard for sacred traditions, but rather one guided by a strong moral compass.

Although this was the outcome I had secretly hoped for, a lingering unease still clutched my heart. I had no time to dwell on this emotion as his piercing gaze returned to me, demanding my full attention.

“Considering your heritage carries its own burdens and expectations, tell me how you would handle such a situation.”

I hadn’t expected him to turn the inquiry back to me. I hesitated beneath the weight of his question. “I believe in protecting our heritage, which connects us to something greater than ourselves. However, I also value the wisdom of our ancestors, who understood that true preservation requires adaptation.”

Prince Darcel nodded slowly. “Such a wise perspective speaks of deep respect for both the past and the present challenges.”

I observed him closely, searching for any hint of duplicity or a mere performance of integrity. However, his responses throughout our discussion appeared genuine, marked by a respect for tradition and a measured approach to the moral complexities we faced.

My initial determination to test him began to wane, overtaken by a burgeoning respect and perhaps the first threads of trust. His replies not only demonstrated a depth of character that aligned with my own values, but also hinted that he could indeed be a capable guardian not just of my family’s secrets but the broader welfare of the kingdom.

However, true trust extended beyond a few articulate responses; it was ultimately defined by one's actions. As we finished preparing for the night, I positioned myself between Sir Jiang and Kael, keeping a vigilant watch on Prince Darcel as he took up the first watch. If he harbored any dishonorable intentions, the quiet of the night would present the perfect opportunity for him to reveal them.

I sensed someone staring at me and turned to find Kael still awake, watching me through narrowed eyes, as if trying to solve a complex puzzle. The look vanished the moment he caught my gaze, replaced with his usual smile that for all its friendliness stirred the anxiety that had accompanied his presence ever since our interaction at the stream after he caught me bathing.

Throughout our trek up the misty mountains I’d anticipated a confrontation about my disguise as a man, but his behavior was as it always was. Yet though his good cheer remained, his sharp scrutiny seemed to follow each of my movements; I sensed a shadow carefully concealed behind each friendly gesture, an unease similar to a prisoner awaiting execution.

Kael’s careful observation created the sense that he was privately conducting his own test on my character, making me feel like a hypocrite for the one I’d laid out for the prince. The guilt haunted me as sleep settled over the others and I was kept awake observing Prince Darcel to see whether he was tempted, torn between wanting a reason to continue to dislike him while also yearning for him to prove worthy of my trust.

Though darkness cloaked the chamber, Lumis provided enough light to reach the prince, illuminating his internal conflict evident in the longing looks he frequently cast down the corridor in the direction where he believed the rare silverleaf herb resided. Yet for all his yearn-filled glances, he remained at his post.

“He’s not taking the bait,” Lumis observed.

I sighed.I suppose he’s not.

“Strange that he passed your test and yet you seem so disappointed.”

I startled at the lantern’s insight, one I didn’t want to acknowledge, especially when I had no reason to feel such an illogical emotion.With all that is at stake, why wouldn’t I want to trust him?

“Perhaps as a way to rationalize the deceit you yourself are guilty of.”

I flinched.At least I have a reason for my actions: to protect my father. I felt a sharp stab of sadness and worry, deeply missing the man I’d never been separated from before, and struggling with anxiety over his fragile health. I couldn’t regret taking his place on this quest, but fought against fear that he might not be waiting for me when I returned.

Lumis’s voice softened slightly as it responded, yet it still felt compelled to point out my inconsistency. “And how is that motive any more important than His Highness’s desires to protect his people? You’re simply seeking a reason to keep him at a distance because you’re afraid of what might happen should you get too close.”

Lumis’s observation illuminated parts of my heart I hadn’t known existed, leaving me unsettled. I tried to ignore my lantern, but it was impossible to escape its haunting insights.

I continued to watch Prince Darcel. The longer I studied him, the more I discovered a fascinating side of him—the man beneath his stoic persona when he thought no one was looking. The more I stared, the weaker my resistances became, especially when I began to notice subtle similarities: like myself, his true self seemed to be behind his own disguise. I felt a strange urgency to peel back its layers and peek at what was hidden on the inside.

A deeper, more unsettling desire slowly began to take root within me—I yearned not only to lower my disguise and allow him to see my true self as a woman, but to engage in open and meaningful conversations with him so that we could come to truly know each other, beyond the façades we maintained.

And no matter how long I waited, he didn’t stir from his post to retrieve the silverleaf, making me wonder if he was worth placing my trust in after all.

CHAPTER 10

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