Page 5 of Façade

What was I to do now?

CHAPTER2

Ibit my lip in an attempt to stave off my burning tears as I stood outside the palace gates as they slowly closed, forever barring me from the only life I’d ever known. They shut with an ominousclangbefore the guard walked away without a glance back, abandoning me on the other side with nowhere to go.

One guard accompanied me, while the prickling stares of the remaining guards standing at their posts were curious, almost accusatory. A single stolen glance revealed a mixture of pity and suppressed amusement, as if they found my situation humorous. I could understand why: I’d spent my entire life beneath my subjects’ judgmental scrutiny desperately trying to prove myself by living up to my kingdom’s expectations…only to be exposed as a fraud. I’d strained myself chasing an illusion that had finally shattered to reveal the truth.

I wasn’t a princess.

I still hadn’t been able to come to terms with that startling fact. Though my title had brought undo anxiety, I still frantically tried to cling to it, but it was like attempting to hold water—the harder I clung, the more it slipped through my fingers.

I wasn’t a princess. I was a nobody who didn’t even have a name. No matter how ill-fitting my title, it’d still beenmine, and without it…I had nothing, my entire life nothing more than an elaborate lie that now left me with no identity, no direction, no purpose…and most of all, without the love from the family I’d deeply cherished who, in the end, had betrayed me. Part of me knew I should be angry at the betrayal, but all I could feel at the moment was a deep sense of loss.

The guards’ stares grew unbearable, as did the pain that came from standing within view of the familiar palace that until an hour ago had been my home. The majestic structure taunted me with memories of my time spent within its gilded walls, recollections now tainted considering none had been real, yet another reminder of all that had been stolen from me.

The tears I fought to keep back burned my eyes. I needed to leave before my composure faltered completely.

The accompanying guard cleared his throat and stepped forward. “If you’ll follow me, miss.” He beckoned me to follow.

As I turned to accompany him, I spotted my parents—theking and queen,I hastily corrected myself, titles that felt foreign on my tongue. They stood rigidly at a high window, watching me with grave expressions, serving as witnesses to ensure I left quietly.

At catching my notice, they allowed the curtains to fall back to mask them from my view, dismissing me without a word, unable to bother themselves with me now that my purpose had been fulfilled…for I wasn’t their daughter.

My eyes stung at the cruelty twisting my heart.Don’t cry, Evelyn…or whoever you are. But my emotions were too wrung out to obey.

Eventually I forced myself to move, each step away from the palace a near impossible struggle. The guards’ heated stares followed me until I was out of sight, their scrutiny a heavy weight against my heart, just as the ones I’d endured from the servants as they whispered gossip as I’d been escorted from the palace.

Undoubtedly, the news of Estoria’s failure of a princess being nothing more than a decoy would quickly spread to each of my former subjects’ ears, if not by nightfall then certainly by week’s end. Or perhaps my parents—the king and queen—would order for silence until the arrival of therealprincess. Regardless, eventually my failure would be known far and wide, making it all the more real.

Though I obediently left the palace, my heart still felt connected to the place I’d for so long called home, the part of me that just couldn’t let go beckoning me to return. It was more than the fear of being left with nothing should I loosen my hold on the identity that had never been mine; part of me still couldn’t quite believe this new reality—I felt as if I was experiencing a waking nightmare, one that at any moment I hoped to wake up from.

In truth, I never would.

The empty chasm filling my heart grew the farther I got from the palace. As we walked through the capital, I found some semblance of comfort in its familiar buildings I’d often stared at from my palace window. The buildings were like old friends, grounding me when I otherwise felt I might drown.

No one recognized me as I followed the guard through the streets, my new peasant attire helping me blend in. I’d made few public appearances as a princess, something that used to puzzle me but which now made perfect sense, as did the secret missives the king and queen had been receiving these past several weeks. Unfortunately, the price for my understanding had been far too high.

Though I didn’t miss the judgmental stares, to think I’d never be recognized as the princess ever again…while the role had often been uncomfortable, it’d at least beenmine. How would I ever live without it? It was as if I’d lost an essential limb and was now being forced to relearn to walk without guidance…without even a name.

Reality was cruel and most unfair, but I had no choice but to comply to the king and queen’s devastating betrayal just as a commoner would to the laws Their Majesties dictated.

* * *

My all-encompassinghopelessness served as my constant companion as I endured the first week of my new common life.

The guard had led me to a small boarding home and introduced me to the lady of the house, whom Their Majesties had arranged to have train me in mending work the palace hired me to do. My embroidery skills made the task not horribly difficult in terms of skill, but I was slow, especially as the tedious work made it all too easy for my mind to wander.

In addition to this training, I’d been given a little money as “compensation” for my years of unwitting service to the crown. With this money and the income from my new job, I earned enough to rent my cramped room, which was no bigger than a cupboard, and to ensure I didn’t starve, though the food was tasteless and left me perpetually hungry after the rich and abundant meals I’d grown used to. Resentment for my former parents flared before the embers of love I’d barely managed to keep burning tempered it, leaving only the ever-present hurt to guide my steps.

Despite listening intently for them, it took several days for me to hear the first whispers about “the fake princess.” My former subjects’ responses alternated between disbelief—more from shock than from any true confidence in my previous performance—to concluding that the truth explained many things, making me realize how many had seen past the mask of poise I’d worked so hard to maintain. Words were batted about with my former name, none of which were very flattering:unconventional,inattentive,slow with her studies,undutiful,lacking magic. Each sharp attack deepened my perpetual sense of failure.

It was on the streets that I first heard other rumors—not ones concerning the decoy princess, but of a different nature entirely: that of my former engagement. I overheard the whispers not from those circulating the gossip mill but in a secluded alley near the boarding home.

I stumbled upon them not by chance, but after a peculiar dream consumed my restless night. A peculiar glimmer surrounded the images waltzing across my unconsciousness, giving them a surreal quality. A scene unfolded of two men huddled in an abandoned alleyway, whispering about a plot whose details the dreamlike quality of the vision muddled, save for a single phrase, “exploit Estoria’s magic.”

The words echoed through my mind, consuming the entire dream until I awoke panting for breath. Normally upon waking, my dreams melted into foggy folds of forgetfulness, but this one remained as vivid in my thoughts as a memory I’d just seen transpire. Along with the remembrances came a sense of urgency, as if an outside force beckoned me to investigate it, an instinct I felt compelled to follow.

Rosy dawn caressed the abandoned streets as I followed my invisible escort, as if the magic filling the kingdom guided my footsteps. As I neared the same alleyway that had served as the backdrop of my dream, I paused to eavesdrop when a single name spoken in a distinctive accent drifted from the shadows to capture my notice.

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