Page 54 of Façade

“Just as I wish to protect mine. It’s what motivated me to risk everything to take the princess’s place despite knowing I’d inevitably be caught.”

He peered up at me through the hair tousling his forehead. “You and I are more alike than we might want to admit.”

The realization struck me with horror and even a little secret thrill. “Perhaps we are.” It only made the way forward more uncertain, the sense I wandered lost in a dark wood with no hope of finding my way, the only honorable paths before us diverging in opposite directions, each leading to one another’s destruction.

“I can’t convey how much I regret the circumstances that brought us together. I hope one day you’ll forgive me.” His voice sounded quieter in the dark, compelling me to grant him the forgiveness I’d once thought impossible to give, only made possible due to my better understanding of his motives that made it so I no longer hated him, despite his dishonorable course.

“Iwantto forgive you,” I ventured. “But circumstances make it impossible to grant in full.”

“Meaning you’ll continue to do all in your power to thwart me.” He tilted his head, peering at me curiously. “Is it solely for the sake of your kingdom…or is there another reason?”

My heart pounded wildly. I felt as if Ryland’s understanding had illuminated my heart, allowing him to more easily discover the secrets I desperately yearned to keep hidden.

“I—” My mouth had gone dry. I very much couldn’t admit thathewas the reason I wanted to prevent our annulment, so I selected another from the shelves where my other secrets were kept. “When I discovered my entire life was a lie, I lost everything—my identity, my family, and my purpose. When I heard the rumors about your intentions, though I truly wanted to protect my kingdom, I also wanted…” My courage faltered around the admission and I lowered my gaze, unable to finish.

But he seemed to understand the words that remained unspoken. “Your choices were motivated beyond the best interest of the kingdom to include your own desires.”

His tone wasn’t disgusted as I expected it’d be upon discovering my sacrifice had been motivated by selfishness, but as gentle as his expression when I stole a tentative peek upwards. I wasn’t sure whether this direction I’d chosen for our conversation was more dangerous than the topic I’d fought to avoid, but it was too late to turn back now.

“I don’t know who I am outside of being a princess,” I admitted. “All my memories are now tainted by the knowledge that none were real. If I’m forced to entirely let them go, I’m afraid I’ll be left with nothing. Despite my royal identity being nothing more than an illusion, I could cling to it a bit longer if I married you in hopes I could use the time to discover who I am outside of my old royal identity…yet time is something I’m quickly running out of, leaving me feeling more lost than ever.” If only I could create it as easily as the strange illusion of stars and fireflies I’d brought to life.

His look became thoughtful. “I believe you’ve discovered more of your true self than you think. Even in our short time together, I feel as if I’ve come to know you…at least what you’re willing to show me.”

With the way he looked at me now, I experienced a portion of the feeling of being cherished I’d yearned for earlier, as if my wish from my stolen star was being granted. “And who am I?” I managed in a shy whisper.

He hesitated, but something about the night made it easier to open up to one another. “You’re Evie.”

I stilled at the nickname. “Evie?”

He blushed, as if only just now realizing his slip of the tongue. “I’ve been calling you that in my thoughts for quite some time, and it just…slipped out.” He was quiet a moment. “Do you hate it? I can call you by your full name if you’d prefer.”

His shoulders slumped with relief when I shook my head. “I like Evie.” Far more than I wanted to admit. The nickname felt even more special considering it’d come from him. With it and his kind words, I felt that in addition to handing me a new identity, he’d also illuminated the one I’d been searching for midst the surrounding darkness…and from the most unexpected source.

“And who is this Evie you’ve come to discover?” I held my breath as I awaited his answer.

He leaned forward until he was only a breath away, and for a startled moment I wondered if he’d kiss me…but he only brushed aside my hair aside to lean towards my ear, as if to share a precious secret. “Evie is a remarkable woman—brave, loyal, unconventional, feisty, interesting…and sweet. But if you’re still wanting to discover more, perhaps we can find her together so that when we eventually part ways, you’ll no longer be lost.”

Together. I wanted to cradle that word close for however long we had remaining. His words held hope and a promise that despite all I’d lost, by the time our journey concluded I’d be more complete than when we’d embarked…even as I wondered if discovering my true self was even what I most wanted, not when the one I most desired to discover washim.

I wanted to remain in the beauty and reverence of this special moment with Ryland forever, but the hour was late, forcing it to end before I could further explore the feelings blooming ever more strongly inside of me.

He escorted me back to camp, slowing as we neared to glance back at me. “Evie?”

I eagerly stepped forward, leaning as close as I dared. “Yes?” I held my breath in anticipation for what he might say.

He hesitated. “Evie, I—“ After a long moment, he released his wavering breath. “Do I…snore?”

I gaped at him, disappointed by the question, even though I was unsure what I’d wanted him to ask instead. I forced my wandering thoughts back to when I’d woken and Ryland had still been asleep. To my deep disappointment he didn’t snore after all, robbing me of fodder with which to tease him. Though his lack of snoring could be considered good news for the future nights we spent together…moments of which there were very few remaining. My heart sank at the thought before I forced a mischievous smile.

“Like a wild beast, a truly atrocious sound. You were lucky no hunters were nearby to mistake you for their prey.”

His lips quirked up. “So do you.”

My smile immediately faltered as I stiffened. “Did you fall asleep after me?” That wouldn’t normally be a problem, except I wasn’t entirely surewhenin the night I’d scooted closer to him.

“I did.” He leaned back towards my ear. “It appears my wife is a bed hog. For someone who was doing her best to avoid touching me with that rock wall, your defenses faltered surprisingly quickly the moment it was safe to curl close to your dashing husband.” With a mischievous wink, he returned to our bed, leaving me staring after him with horror paralyzing my limbs.

Oh no, oh no, oh no…he’d known, known our entire exchange but hadn’t said anything, the scoundrel. But if he’d known…why hadn’t he pushed me away?

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