Page 38 of Carter's #Undoing

SERENITY

Rest didn’t comeeasy for me last night, especially since I had chosen to sleep in my bed alone. Even with Carter letting Colt sleep in my room, Colt had been knocked out, having the best wolf-dog dreams if his drool was any indication. I, on the other hand, spent most the time staring out into the stars before I realized that the only thing that would help me sleep was if I read more of Carter’s letters. And man, was I glad I did.

Not every letter that Carter wrote had seemed dipped in despair and enclosed in an envelope like a stitched together mouth. There were others in the mix. Ones that reminisced about his childhood and his family. Good memories with them. Great memories of us. Granted, hidden between the lines of his pages held more secrets than my heart could handle. Visualizations of him sitting in a dark corner, a part of my carefree, golden boy dying with every word.

Yet, somehow, it also seemed as if he’d found himself in a way, and I didn’t know if it was through some of the people he befriended on his journey, like Avery’s father whose division in the CIA had been trying to find a serial killer and recruited Carter for the job. I would probably never know the whole story, but I could tell from that letter that Carter greatly admired the time he’d worked with Avery’s dad, proving that the world was even smaller than I realized.

And more crooked,that voice taunted as I continued to read his letters when I escaped the confines of my bedroom and made my way to the deck for some fresh air. I sat down in the chair that had become my favorite hangout spot, and not long after, Colt joined me and laid at my feet.

The current letter was another tearjerker and made me wish I knew where Carter was at in the house so that I could give him a quick hug before I finished it.

The letter ended with ‘Life isn’t fair’.A statement that I admit I’d thought on more than one occasion. I’d had my fair share of fucked up things happen during my childhood … then again, my adult life was much better, even though Carter hadn’t been around. Carter experienced a pretty great childhood, just to turn around and have an adult life filled with violence.

We were two different sides of the same coin, only on the same page during that rare moment when the coin managed to spin in a circle before falling. As much as I’d convinced myself I no longer believed in happily-ever-after, being here with Carter almost made me think that maybe, justmaybe, we could have a decent ending.

My thoughts were cut short when Colt jumped up, suddenly on high alert. I’d gotten used to the fact that he was taller than my waist, but his entire mood changed as he surveyed the woods below us.

I let the blanket I had draped over me drop to the floor, leaving me only in shorts and a tank since it was one of the warmer days. Slowly, I began walking backwards to the door, Colt doing the same in front of me. It was the little training I’d had with Carter so far. Don’t scream. Move inside of the house. Always stay behind Colt if Carter wasn’t there. Even though I still couldn’t see anything, Colt was the only signal I needed to know something was wrong.

I didn’t even hear the door open behind me, but Carter had tugged me inside and joined Colt on the deck holding a bigger pistol than he’d brought outside the last time before I even realized he was there.

I watched from the glass door as a drone flew from behind the trees and headed to the deck. At least, I think it looked like a drone. Carter shot it down so fast, I couldn’t get a good look.

I wanted to step outside, but knew I couldn’t until Carter gave me the clear. The scream I was holding in almost broke free when the tarp and the top of the hot tub lifted.

“What the hell?”

Four men hopped out of it; my eyes were on Carter and Colt to see what they would do and watch for a sign for me to run. However, instead of Carter aiming a gun at the intruders, he placed the gun in the back of his jeans and hugged the first guy who stepped out before greeting the others. And Colt had turned off his killer wolf-dog instincts.

I observed all five men for a few seconds as they interacted, my mind trying to piece together who they were. I’d never seen them before, but clearly, they were friends of Carter’s.And I guess that hot tub isn’t a hot tub after all.

I didn’t know if I made a noise, or if they felt like they were all being watched, but when they all turned to me, I suddenly wished I’d had the good sense to put on some decent clothes.

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