Page 88 of Fighting

“I’m sorry, your what?” Delia exclaims.

“It was dropped. I was speeding in Matty’s car. Speaking of, I thought I gave it back to him,” I say, slouching forward and heaving out my breath.

“He parked it here. Said he wanted you to have the option if you need it,” Delia softly replies.

“Can you put a tarp on it?”

“Do you have a tarp?” she quips.

I wiggle my arms free of the blanket and pop my head out, then snag my phone from the mattress beside me. “I will by tomorrow night, so yes?”

The annoyance in her expression morphs to amusement, and she lets out a laugh. The sound is infectious. I join in, andin seconds, the tension I brought home with me dissipates a fraction more.

“She tried to tell me that I was pushing him away because I’m scared. That I am punishing him for something he didn’t do. Some kind of high horse babble like that. I’ll give her credit for the effort she put into trying to psychoanalyze me.” I huff. “Also, she said I think I’m better than her because of my education. As if I didn’t work hard to get where I am.”

“On days like this, I’m so thankful to be an only child. Damn. Must have been hard to hear that truth bomb.”

Before the words can register, she snatches a pillow from the head of the bed and holds it up in front of her face.

My stomach drops. “Excuse you?”

She peeks around the pillow, cringing. “Babe, I’ve been too tired lately to be in your business as often as I used to be. But denial? River boat for one.”

I take out an invisible nail file and pretend to sharpen my claws. “Yeah? Why is that?”

She clicks her tongue. “Because you did fall for him, and now you are treating him like he has the plague. But why? Because of your own mistakes? Because you discovered that, like the rest of the population, you’re imperfect?”

“Because I’m scared,” I shout. “I’m embarrassed. I’m an expert in my field, yet I missed the signs. It took Caleb showing back up and my public meltdown for me to realize he wasabusive. That even if he didn’t put his hands on me, that relationship was coercive and manipulative, and it broke me.”

I retreat into the blanket, letting my shame wash over me.

Whispering, Delia asks, “So you pushed Matty away?”

My responding nod forces the blanket to shift, freeing my face. “I pushed him away.”

The door opens a crack, and I jump sky high. The doorway is empty, but it continues to swing open. Then there’s a tiny meow and a black cat jumps onto the bed.

Heart lifting a fraction, I scoop up the kitten. It’s wearing a pink collar decorated with light pink bows. The tag around his neck saysWyclef.My eyes fill with tears again as I turn to Delia.

She’s holding a piece of paper out to me, her lips tipped in a small smile.

With a shaky breath, I take it and wipe the moisture from my eyes with the back of one wrist.

Nessa,it says.

I hoped that during the festival, you’d see how great we are together, but I’m not sure how well we weathered the… um, weather? I couldn’t let Wy-Guy go to anyone else. I hope we can talk when you’re ready.

xo—M

Heart lurching, I hold the cat and note to me. “Wyclef?”

“He showed up in a little kennel, along with a basket of food, toys, and a litter box.”

I nuzzle him, relishing the silkiness of his fur.

Delia stands and pads out of the room, flipping off the light, leaving me alone with my new kitten and an uncomfortable sinking feeling.

thirty-nine

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