Now Sergio’s back. Front and center in my head.
Erin and I are going so well; we made great strides this weekend. Even I felt that shift, how we’re closer than before, and I know… I know this news is going to test that. Maybe shatter it.
Because I know Erin.
She’s decent. Not a liar, even if she kept the pregnancy from me longer than I’d like, the fact Alina knew tells me everything. Erin was definitely going to tell me on the trip. I just beat her to it.
But decent is something I’m not. I’m trying to be. I’d more than have her as mine and suffer through an unconsummated marriage to Stefina if that’s what had to happen to keep my little family safe and protected.
Erin wouldn’t. To her it would be a lie. Already the fact I’m engaged against my will is still sitting uncomfortably in her.
I could just lie. Not tell her.
Not that I might marry Stefina because I’m most definitely not. But moving the wedding date.
Right now, it’s far off in her head. Next week is a punch to the stomach.
And the last thing I want to do is destroy our good place.
On the flipside, we agreed no more secrets. And if she finds out from someone else, she’ll be rightly pissed.
Maybe to the point we fall apart.
I throw back my drink and head out. No, the best thing to do is tell her myself. Honesty, right?
Sasha’s whining about not being outside. It’s raining steadily now, and both my sister, Olga, and Erin are trying to distract him. I can see him pressed at the glass in the kitchen and he looks back and sees me.
“Dino, park!”
“No park, Sasha. You’ll get wet.” Erin tries to pull him back from the window, but he throws off her hand.
A sly little smile turns his mouth. “Park.”
I almost laugh. He wants to play in the rain.
“No park today,” I say. “We’ll go tomorrow.”
His eyes light up. “The big one?”
“The big one.”
Then Erin turns her face to me, and her smile slips. “What is it?”
“Can we talk in private?”
She nods and I lead her into the living room where I sit her down.
“There’s been a development.” I run a hand over my face. She stares at me, hands clenched, and my heart lurches.
But I have to say it. I’ve never shied from the dirtiest of work my business, my world demands of me to keep alive, to thrive, and I’m not tumbling at this. Even though telling herthe truth seems so much worse than killing a man with my bare hands.
I release a breath. “Sergio wants the wedding to take place next week. Ilya and I are working hard to find a way out, and we will. But you deserve to know the truth.”
She doesn’t say a word. But then she quietly nods.
“Thank you for being honest, Demyan.”
“Erin, this is something I’ll work out. I just have to do it sooner than I thought. We have options, too.”