Page 116 of Scarlet Secrets

He closes his eyes and nods, then he looks at me again. “I didn’t expect you, Erin. I should have. Right from that first moment, I knew you were special and that’s why I left. I had business, yes, but I could have gotten your details, given you mine, and I didn’t because unlike Alina, I don’t deserve all that. But I want to.”

“Demyan…” His name falls from my lips. His pain hurts me. His self-savagery cuts deep. “No. You do.”

“Do I? Because I don’t feel like I do. The thing is, I lost it there with my closest friend because seeing you with a man, even Ilya whom I know would never touch you, made me sick with rage.”

It’d be easy to fall into that, to be swayed by what he’s saying, but I can’t. There’s Sasha to think about.

“You don’t trust me.”

He frowns. “No?—”

“Demyan, yes. You don’t. You can’t use brutal force to make anyone want you. That shit turns me away. Trust. You have to trust. And you ask for mine, but it goes both ways.” I place a hand against his lean cheek, his whiskers soft. The man needs a shave. “I get it’s a big ask. I kept things from you. I kept your son. All the reasons and circumstances don’t matter. Bottom line is I did that. And I have to live with it.”

“Erin.”

But I shake my head. “If we’re going to make a go of this, you must trust me, too. I haven’t looked at another man since laying eyes on you. That’s the bottom line. No one’s ever piqued my interest. You’re back in my life and I’m certainly not looking at men when I actually have you.”

I put my other hand to his other cheek. “We both have to trust. Otherwise, there’s no future. That means no more secrets.”

He nods and curls a hand through my hair, pulling me down and kissing me with such soft reverence that I can’t feel my toes.

The kiss deepens and his fingers find the hem of my shirt, sliding up under it, and I groan because right or wrong, I need this. And for some reason, sex heals with us.

I climb on him and he flips us, spreading my thighs, his fingers sliding up and into my naked pussy. I didn’t bring underwear into the bathroom. And I’m glad I didn’t grab them because his fingers are magic and he slowly thrusts into me, his mouth moving down over my shirt until he reaches my tummy.

He whisks it up to kiss my bare flesh, kissing and licking a path down to my clit.

I moan and grip his hair as he starts to slowly lick upalong my lips to my clit and down. He circles it, not giving me what I want, and in that denial, giving me so much more.

I’m frenzied, rising up, chasing the high he can give. And the bastard chuckles against me as he finally, finally closes his mouth around my clit.

This is where he’ll offer forth a little bite that sends me spinning.

Except he doesn’t.

Instead, he sucks and kisses and sucks and kisses, driving me utterly out of my mind. Pleasure radiates and it’s not enough and too much all at the same time.

Then he sucks. Hard, and I fly, shattering and pulsating and shaking.

I don’t even notice him withdraw as the orgasm is sweeping in waves through me, aftershocks that keep taking me. I don’t notice until he rises above me and slams home.

The stretch of his cock as it invades and fills me makes me gasp and he sets up a hot beat of a fuck and I just raise my hips to meet him, clinging until he goes at it, harder and harder until he groans and his cock seems to swell in me, and he then jerks and comes deep, setting me off again.

When we’re done, he pulls me into his arms, his mouth skimming over my skin, his touch soft and sweet. He nuzzles in against my ear. “I love you.”

My whole body soars and I grip him tight. “I love you, too.”

I do, but even as I say it, in the back of my mind, the seed of doubt I felt earlier returns. Not about him or love or anything so prosaic. But about how Demyan is. Who he is.

I know he’s involved in crime, and organized crime at that. I’d have to be an idiot not to know that. Though I’ve tried to remain ignorant, I can’t.

Do I even belong in his world with him? I don’t know. He wants his son, but me fitting in?

He kisses me and gets up and heads to the shower, whistling as he goes.

I snuggle down. Tonight’s been a roller coaster and I’m not sure if this is a good time to keep analyzing things.

His phone pings while he’s in the bathroom. I don’t know what makes me do it, but I pick it up.

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