Page 109 of Scarlet Secrets

There must be something on my face because Ilya says, “One thing I think you know about him is his penchant for grudges. Wrong him and he’ll hold a grudge forever, but do right and you’ll never have a more loyal or caring person in your corner.”

I swallow hard.

His words are meant to comfort me, but they don’t. Because I did something to him. It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t vindictive, and Demyan never gave me his details. If Tom wasn’t my brother, then this would have played out the same way, only then I’d never have even had an option of whether to reach out.

In Demyan’s eyes, I wronged him.

And you can’t really wrong someone more than keeping their child from them.

The cruelty of his keeping Sasha from me for those painful days, of showing me the video to twist the knife… that’s what happens when you wrong someone.

And Demyan’s dangerous. Ilya just said so.

What if I’m not forgiven, not really?

“Erin.” Ilya’s smile is a welcoming, reassuring thing. I know he’s deadly, too, but he’s so much softer, and he’s fun. Sasha blooms around him, especially now that Demyan’s not here much and that weighs on me, too. It— “Stop.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, just…” He breathes in. “Just know he cares. I’ve never seen him let someone in so quickly like he has you. Both you and Sasha mean the world to him. You… youaffect him in ways I’ve never seen before. And it’s incredible to see.”

I set down my mug and smile back. “Time to get some of this busy work you’ve given me done.”

The followingevening after dinner we’re drinking wine and laughing and it’s good, so good to see Alina smiling.

She looks at us. “Sasha’s asleep. Who wants to play poker?”

Ilya rolls his eyes. “You’ll be broke by the end of the first round.”

“Really?” She dumps a bag of poker chips on the table. “Put your mouth where the chips are, baby.”

“Fine.” He just drinks his wine and grins.

“I don’t have any money,” I say. “So?—”

Alina looks at me. “We’re not playing for money, just the chips and the pride.”

“Damn right,” says Ilya.

He shuffles the deck of cards Alina produces and we start to play. I’m terrible at it. The last time I played was with Max at college, but I keep that to myself.

Ilya regales us with boarding school stories of Demyan. From when he was smaller all through secondary, and a picture emerges of a boy who goes from playful to serious young man and my heart hurts.

And then Ilya leans forward. “Did I tell you about the apple incident? Once I dared Demyan to steal an apple from the headmaster’s room. But he stole all of them. And when he got caught, he denied it. Pockets bulging with apples and he did such a good job, he got me detention. He pinned it on me. Said he didn’t see me sneak the apples into his pockets.”

We laugh as he builds on the scenario, making it more andmore outrageous, Demyan seemingly more pious and Ilya more villainous when it was the other way around.

I’m laughing so hard picturing it, I almost fall out of my chair. Ilya catches me when a voice speaks behind us.

Quiet. Deadly.

Turning the room to ice in moments flat.

“What the fuck?” Demyan.

But Ilya just motions him over. “Don’t be like that. They believe you about the apples. Well, maybe Erin needs some convincing…”

Demyan storms over and grabs Ilya by the throat, hauling him out of his chair and sending chips, glasses, and cards scattering to the ground. He slams his friend against the wall.

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