Page 39 of Finn

I stare at him, shocked and maybe a little emotional about what I’ve just learned. This is not the way my mom and dad made it out. It’s the complete opposite, actually.

I glance at Finn, who hasn’t removed his hand from my leg but has no expression on his face at all. Then I look back toward Porter. He looks defeated, and it makes my heart squeeze.

“So, what happened?” I whisper.

He sighs and scrubs his face before looking straight into my eyes. At that moment, I realize we have the same eyes, and it makes me think of Finn’s mom. I just told him that I’m grateful for his mom even though she was a horrible mother to him. Maybe I should be grateful for Porter too.

“Our marriage was great. We were married just over two years when she got pregnant with you.” He looks off for a minute with a small smile on his face. His eyes slide back to mine, and that small smile gets bigger. “She came here and pushed those doors open while we were all around the table. Brooks started yelling. Enzo jumped up. Riley kicked his feet up on the table and laughed.” He laughs at the memory. “I just stared at her. I thought she lost her mind busting in here like that. But she didn’t bat an eye. She ignored everyone and moved to stand right in front of me. I asked her what was wrong, and a huge smile spread across her face as one single tear slid down her cheek. She whispered that she was pregnant. So quietly that I wasn’t sure I heard her correctly. I jumped up and grabbed her face and asked her to say it again. She started laughing and screamed, ‘I’m pregnant. We’re having a baby.’ We both cried as the rest of the guys in the club probably stared at us like we were fucking crazy.”

I look down at the table, trying to collect my emotions. It’s a powerful story. You can feel the love, and it confuses me even more.

“The months leading up to your birth were amazing. We had a nursery set up, and I bought you a pink leather jacket. I still have it in the attic.” He shakes his head. “The day she went into labor, it was like a comedy. I was freaking out, and while she was trying to breathe through the contractions, she was trying to calm me down.” All three of us laugh at that, and I can see my caring mom doing something so natural. That’s the woman I know. “I finally pulled myself together and got her to the hospital. You were born, and my fucking world flipped. You were this tiny, perfect bundle of pink. I didn’t think it was possible to love someone as much as I loved your mother, but damn, did you prove me wrong.”

Finn reaches over and brushes away a tear I didn’t even realize was running down my cheek. “I’m right here, baby,” he whispers, kissing my cheek.

“Finn, you’re my brother, but I swear if you touch my daughter in front of me again, I’m gonna reach over this table and rip your fucking heart out,” Porter hisses.

Finn laughs and rests his hand back on my thigh. I, on the other hand, look at Porter, uncertain of how I feel about him calling me his daughter. I know I am, but I don’t feel like it. I don’t know him. But it also made me feel a sense of acceptance once again.

This is all so confusing.

“Anyway, it was great for a bit after we brought you home. Unfortunately, after that, your mom started to struggle. We didn’t realize at the time it was postpartum depression. She was really having a difficult time, and I was helping as much as I could. I would stay up nights so she could sleep. I would bring you here, which you loved cause of all the attention. I did anything I could to make it easier, but nothing seemed to be working. It was hard to watch. But one day, I came home, and she was herself again. She was happy and playing with you, and I felt immediate relief. I didn’t think too much about it. I thought it was a rough patch, and we’d gotten over it. Things were back to normal.” He looks down at the table and shakes his head. “I didn’t pay enough attention. I didn’t realize the reason she was so happy again was that she started using drugs.”

I sit up straighter, shaking my head. “My mom doesn’t use drugs,” I say.

“I’m hoping she doesn’t anymore, but she did, Mia. She was popping pills, and when I tried to talk to her about it, she didn’t like that. It was a few weeks after that that I got the divorce papers and a note saying she took you and wasn’t coming back. She threatened to go to the cops and tell them I was abusing her and you if I tried to find her. She said Jim had all the power, and if I tried, I’d end up in jail or worse.” He closes his eyes and sighs. “I made sure you were safe. I sent people to check on you over the years. But I kept my distance because I knew her threat was real. Jim would make sure of it.”

I swallow and look between him and Finn. “I don’t believe you. My mom would never do something so awful to anyone,” I whisper in disbelief.

He pulls a few papers out of his pocket and slides them across the table. “I figured you wouldn’t.”

I open the folded papers, and I can feel how old and delicate the paper is. I see the divorce papers and push them aside for the handwritten note. My tears fall harder with each word I read. It is definitely my mom’s handwriting, and the way she spoke to Porter is heartbreaking. Not only did she threaten him, but she ripped apart the relationship they had. It doesn’t sound anything like my mom, and I can’t believe she was this malicious.

The paper falls from my hands, and I cover my face, crying harder than I probably should be. Finn wraps his arms around me, and I welcome his warmth, pressing my face against his solid chest.

“Take a breath, baby,” he whispers, rubbing my back.

“I’m sorry, Mia. I didn’t want to taint the image you have of your mom, but Jim isn’t making things easy, and it’s important you know the full story,” Porter says.

I pull away from Finn and stare at Porter. “What is he doing? Do I need to get my mom away from him?”

Porter and Finn share a long look before Porter glances back toward me.

“You should, Mia. You should call her and get her here. But you can’t tell her why. Tell her you need her or that you’re lonely, anything you can think of that will get her away from Jim and here with you,” Porter says.

I look between both of them and decide to be honest. Porter, at the very least, deserves to know. “I thought growing up that they had this undeniable love. They were always together, never anyone but the three of us. The way he didn’t allow her to do anything, I saw it as him being protective. But when I went home, I saw a side of him I’d never seen. He wouldn’t even allow my mom to talk. There was a control I’d never noticed, and it scared me. And now you’re telling me I should get her away, so tell me what I need to do because I don’t want her in danger,” I rush out.

“That motherfucker,” Porter growls, bringing his fists down on the table.

“Baby, I’ll help you make the call. We’ll call when we get home. I’ll go get her myself if I need to,” Finn says, running his thumb down my cheek.

“No, I’ll go get her if that’s what it comes to,” Porter says.

I look at him and sigh. “You never stopped loving her. You said you loved her, but you still love her, don’t you?”

“I told you it was a promise I never broke. I always have and always will love her and you. When you’re ready, I’d love to get to know you now,” he says.

Putting all the bad shit behind me, like Gillian said, I nod. “I’d like that.”

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