“This is the right decision, right?”
“Yes.” Abagail affirmed her each time Nicola asked this question, but it was still a major step. They had three days to figure it out over the long weekend, but that wasn’t going to be long enough. Nicola was preparing herself for months of adjustment. She and Alanna had never gotten along super well when they’d shared a room as teenagers, so she couldn’t imagine this would go that much better. Even though their relationship now was entirely different.
“Stop worrying,” Abagail whispered, pressing her palm to Nicola’s bouncing knee. “It’ll be fine.”
“I know.” Nicola winced. “I just can’t help but worry.”
Abagail laughed. “I’ll distract you tonight.”
“No, not tonight. I can’t—with Alanna in the house?”
“She’s living on a completely separate floor than where our rooms are.” Abagail gave Nicola a hard stare.
“I know, but she’ll be there.”
“If you think your adult sister doesn’t think about sex on at least one occasion or another, then I think you have another thing coming.”
Nicola squeaked. “Oh God, I don’t want to think about that.”
“Don’t think about the details.” Abagail leaned in and kissed Nicola’s cheek. “At least not with her. Feel free to think about them with me.” Abagail turned Nicola’s face so their lips brushed. “I promise you that everything will be fine.”
“Yeah. It’ll be great.” Nicola kissed her again. “All right. We can do this.”
“Youcan.” Abagail made that correction without even thinking about it.
Nicola had noted that too throughout the last few months. It was definitely something that put a fair amount of distance between them. But at the same time, Abagail was here and walking this road with her, each and every step of the way. She wasn’t checking out, and Nicola had to remind herself of that when she started to doubt Abagail’s interest in her.
Resting her head on Abagail’s shoulder, Nicola closed her eyes and focused.
She could do this.
Everything would be better in the end.
She just had to get through this rough time of transition and then she’d find her balance again. And Abagail would be the perfect calm to the storm that Nicola was about to be. It’d really be good for everyone to have that.
“I love you,” Nicola whispered, fully not expecting Abagail to say it back. So when she was met with silence, Nicola smiled to herself. “Yep, I fucking love you.”
forty
“How was the party?” Nicola asked as soon as Abagail stepped into the house.
Abagail pursed her lips, dropping her gaze down Nicola’s body and back up. She had wished Nicola had been with her, but she understood her reasons for avoiding that mess of a family. Abagail hadn’t really wanted to attend Estelle’s annual New Year’s party either, but the shame and obligation that she show up for at least a part of it ate away at her.
“Satisfactory. No major drama.” Abagail stood in the middle of the den, continuing to eye Nicola over. What would it have been like to stay home with her and Alanna and have a New Year’s with people she actually cared about instead of with family she felt obligated to? “How was your evening?”
“Oh, not bad. Alanna fell asleep around ten.” Nicola giggled. “So much for staying up for the ball to drop.”
Abagail nodded, pulling at the buttons on her jacket to shuck it. The dress she’d worn that night was a simple black dress that formed to her curves. She’d added silver and gold jewelry to it but kept it simple. “Warren and Chaya are in the middle of an argument, but at least he’s managed to keep a job for two months.”
Nicola hummed, her lips pressed into a thin line. Abagail supposed she wasn’t all that interested in hearing about Warren, but the argument had sparked thoughts that were continuing to run wild through Abagail’s brain. Ones she wasn’t able to turn off.
“They were arguing about a prenup and what it should include.”
“I suppose Warren came to his much wiser Aunt Abagail for advice on that front.”
Abagail nodded, taking off her jacket and throwing it over the chair. She ran her hand through her hair as she stepped closer to Nicola, half stalking her as she moved slowly. “They did, and I had very little advice.”
“You? I don’t believe that.” Nicola laughed lightly but nervously. But was she anxious about the way Abagail was moving toward her or the topic of conversation itself?