Page 44 of Seas the Dating Coach

“Carol. Always a pleasure.” Nick’s broad grin widens as he steps into the house with his tool bag.

The sight of Nick makes me suddenly bereft for a relationship I’ve never had. Nick’s girlfriend, Summer, has tried a few times to connect with me, as have a few others over the years, but I’d always stuck to my old patterns of solitude and silence.

What would my life be like if I had evenone moreperson to lean on? So when I have things I want to hash out, I could? Summer had once confided in me when things were murky between her and Nick, and now look at them. They’re so sweetly in love it makes your teeth ache.

A single thought jolts to the front of my mind. I should add a part four to my plan—make new friends. I’ve got Summer’s phone number from when I replaced the zipper on her favorite holiday dress last Christmas. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind an invitation to meet me for coffee next Saturday.

“Hi, Vivian.” Nick’s smile relaxes into something gentler. “Good to see you.”

“You too.”

“Wendy, I hear you have a misbehaving sink.” He runs his fingers through his hair, displacing sawdust.

“Nicolas,” Carol scolds. “Can’t you dust yourself off before coming inside?”

“It’s fine.” Wendy collects Nick by the elbow, tugging him toward the downstairs bathroom. “Tomorrow is cleaning day, anyway.”

They’re halfway down the entry hall when Wendy looks over her shoulder. “Vivian, do you mind waiting a minute?”

“Actually, I need to get going.” My hands grip the tote bag still slung over my shoulder.

“Stay, dear. It won’t be any trouble.” Carol’s smile is just short of devious.

Though Carol has always been kind to me—or kinder to me than she is to most—I know that speaking to Wendy with her present will only spread my news faster than a fire in a paper factory.

I’mthis closeto selling my dress collection, to everything being different.

My lips clamp tight as I shake my head.

Carol tuts as I take my exit, but once I’m back outside in the fresh sea air, everything feels clearer. The answer to this crazy day is right there, waiting. I trade the asphalt of Wendy’s street for the deck boards of the dune cut-through leading to the beach. Seeing the steady roll of the waves as I crest the walkway loosens my nervous tension.

I kick my sandals off and tuck them next to the beach posting with all the other shoes. Several beachgoers pack up while those who just got home from working on the mainland take their evening walks. I set my tote in the dry sand and wade straight into the waves, fully clothed.

It’s not the first time I’ve sought solace in the sea. Brynn won’t even blink when I come home sodden, I’ve done this so often. Once I’m deep enough to dunk my head below the waves, true calm sluices down my spine. I push beyond the wave break and tread water, thinking about everything. My dress billows up around my arms, but the soft sensation of the fabric brushing my fingertips is soothing.

A squadron of pelicans soars along as I tilt to float on my back. The sky is endless while drifting like this—a bright, beautiful blue. Water fills my ears, limiting extraneous sound and softening the noise inside my head. A slow exhale leaves my open mouth as I revel in the buoyant calm that comes with being supported by water. Some people find peace by hiking throughtrees or clinging to rocks, but my first love will always be the ocean.

The water swells beneath me almost in a reciprocating caress, and an easy smile splits my lips, my confidence returning. I can keep my secret one more day. And if I freeze up at the fair or something goes horribly wrong, I’ll deal with that then. I’ve done all the preparation and planning I can. Now, I need to believe in myself. I’ve already done things I’ve only dreamt of over these last two weeks. I can do this.

And when flirty Finn texts me at ten-thirty tonight, I know just how I’ll set him straight.

nineteen

Finn

Twenty minutes into weaving through the lush farmland that separates Wilks Beach from the outskirts of the city, my sister calls. My mouth loosens into a smile as I answer the phone, not realizing how tight my teeth had been clenched.

“Hey, Cordelia.”

“Did you know?” The question is a watery plea followed by a heavy sniffle.

My shoulders tighten as I sit up taller in the driver’s seat. “Know what?”

“That dad is taking away my trust?”

A string of expletives rushes through my mind, but I keep my voice even. “Who told you that?”

“So it’s true?” She wails when I don’t immediately refute it. “I can’t live without Dad’s money, Finn. I’m not like you. I’m not smart enough to make it on my own. Maybe I could if Dad let mesay yes to any one of the reality shows, but he won’t because that would ‘taint the Otto name.’” A hiccup echoes over the line. “All I’m good at is socializing and parties, and I—I can’t make a living off that. I guess I could get married—”

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