Page 86 of Finance Bros

“Okay.”

“So, it was basically a crime scene. Like I didn’t belong in there, and I never had, and the room kicked me the fuck out, and I was basically supposed to forget it ever existed and pretend I never went there.”

Ryan’s squinting. “If this gets any more complicated, I’m gonna need you to move off the metaphor.”

I hold up a hand because I think I’m about to make it clear enough. “When you pushed me into the wall, and I thought you were gonna kiss me Saturday night, the door flew back open. Monday night, the light came on. Tuesday night, I was back in the room, and it wasn’t scary anymore because I knew what everything was. I remembered what brought me there in the first place.”

“Which was?”

“You ask too many questions,” I say, looking down at the bedspread.

“Prepare yourself because I have another one,” he says. “How do you know it’s not gonna kick you out again?”

“Because I’m not a child anymore? Because repression only works until the memories resurface? Because I’m in control of my brain now? How do those reasons sound?”

“Plausible.”

I can sense he wants to ask me something, so I wait.

Then he comes out with it. “Were you hurt, Mal?”

“No,” I whisper. “Not like that. No. But if it’s okay, can we not go there? It’s got a lot to do with my mom, and I don’t want to…” Itrail off, ignoring the flashbulbs going off in my head, illuminating the memories. The things I saw. The things I felt. The betrayal. The jealousy. The yearning.

Ryan’s hand on my arm makes it all stop. I’m back with him, in his bed, staring into his gorgeous eyes—the one part of him that hasn’t changed at all. “It’s okay,” he says.

“What about you?” I ask. “What are you not telling me?”

“I just don’t want you to turn on me again, and…” he hesitates. “That’s basically it.”

“You sure?”

He nods then says, “I don’t think I’m ready for sex.”

“Okay,” I say, hoping my disappointment doesn’t show.

“But if you insist on spending the night, who the fuck knows, right?”

A smile breaks on my face, so big it hurts my cheeks.

“Just remember I have a roommate,” he says as he moves to hover over me. I roll onto my back, listening to him talk and wishing he would just shut the fuck up and make out with me already. “And he’s shy and weird, so you have to control your noises.”

I don’t trust myself to make that promise, not when I’m about toneedto undo my pants. I don’t know how he stands it in those jeans with that huge dick. Does he enjoy suffering? “Maybe put some music on?” I suggest.

His chest meets mine just before his mouth does. I immediately wrap my legs around him and bring him crashing down on me. I kiss him hard. My tongue too eager, my lips too aggressive, but I can’t help it. He’s been edging me since I walked in the door, and now, shirtless—with our nipples touching, I can’t be expected to control myself, can I?

“Jesus, fuck, I want you,” I say as his teeth graze my jaw.

“I see that.”

“I want out of my pants.”

“Of course you do.” He kisses me again and keeps me busy doing that for a few heated minutes, but I’m just gonna keep bringing it up. He’s gotta breathe eventually. Christ, but I like this part, too. He’s an unbelievable kisser. I hope I’m halfway decent at it, only ever having kissed the one person, but he’s not complaining or trying to force anything different out of me. Although, I don’t kiss him the way I kiss Kaylin for a lot of reasons.

One, I haven’t wanted Kaylin this much since we first started dating. Second, Ryan is more of a force to reckon with. Third, he’s got a bigger mouth in general, so I have to work harder to fill it.

His thumbs brush my nipples, and I gasp, shocked by how good that feels. His hands move down my sides, and we turn slightly so he’s not crushing me. I still have my legs locked around him, but now he’s able to grab my ass and let me know he likes me where he’s got me. Good.

Except it sucks becauseI need out of these fucking jeans.

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