Page 149 of Feathers of Ash and Hope

The constantly changing view on top of my already twisted one causes me to double over, dry heaving, my hands clutching my thighs in support while I fight to stay upright.

Feelings, thoughts, and memories that aren’t mine assault my mind, and my vision gives out. I thrust my arms out for balance.

Mighty claws curl around my arms. I lose the ground beneath my feet and nearly my grip on the curse when I’m flung through the air. I tumble. Flames and clouds of smoke dance around me.

I close my eyes. It’s too much, all of it.

I land on something moving and soft, my fingers grabbing hold of something that feels like feathers. My eyes fly open, trying to focus on what is right in front of me, under me. The gold and red, the yellow and orange look like fire but feel like feathers. There is a pulsing, whooshing sound, like mighty wings.

Wait, those are wings, with feathers made of fire and trailed by smoke.

“How else am I supposed to fly?”the same voice from before asks, sounding amused.

The heat recedes the higher we get, leaving me with a comfortable warmth where I’m touching the feathers and the cool caress of the wind on my heated face.

I am riding on a fucking Phoenix.

And he’s speaking to me, which can only mean—

“Happy you are on board. But I can hear you, you know? And I’m not ‘a fucking Phoenix.’ I’mSolaris.”

How do I answer?I ask myself.

“Just like that is fine,”Solaris answers.

“You can hear my thoughts?”I’m not sure how I feel about that.

“Loud and clear, by the way, you might want to do something about that obsession. I’m not listening to you mooning over that human all day.”

“I’m not—”Why am I defending myself?“Keep out of my thoughts if you don’t want to know what I’m thinking about.”I huff. The world still twists and turns around me, and I’m slipping.

I tighten my grip but lose it again when Solaris caws in protest. My vision narrows, and I fight to stay conscious.

“So we are really…”I try to initiate a conversation, hoping it will keep me awake a little longer.

“Yep, I’m stuck with you now as long as I get you some help soon. You trust this Tate?”he asks.

“With my life,”I answer while a buzzing fills my ears. My pulse pounds through my body, and my vision goes black. I concentrate on the feathers between my fingers, clinging to them with my mind, but I’m slipping again.

“Nothing else will do.”I hear Solaris say before he demands, “Hold on.”He descends, the sudden movements turning my stomach. The air around me is suddenly much cooler. Voices shout. Then there is nothing.

Chapter

Forty-Four

TATE

A flame shootsout of the dark swirls of smoke. No, not a flame, a bird, aPhoenix. I look at it in awe. The images don’t do it justice.

The Phoenix is majestic and raw. Its power is like a physical blow, and its presence captures everyone’s attention. My eyes are so focused on the flaming creature that, at first, I don’t realize someone is sitting on the Phoenix’s back, a huddled figure, lopsided and blackened by soot. Or maybe it’s just the stark contrast between a uniform and the brilliant light of the Phoenix’s flaming feathers.

Relief slams into me when I recognize her, and it turns into horror seconds later when she slides sideways.

No, no, no.

I’m sprinting toward the fiery bird, but I’m too far away.

She falls, her body hitting the ground in a slumped heap like a castaway rag doll.

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