Page 74 of Feathers of Ash and Hope

Zaza snorts. We reach the dining hall, and even though I can see my flight over at the far side, I decide to sit with Zaza for the moment, too interested in what she has to say.

“Jared is flighty like a butterfly, and Tate doesn’t get attached at all.” Zaza ends her report about the men in her flight.

“What are you talking about?” Jared asks while he and Tate sit down opposite us.

“I told Summer that he shouldn’t copy any of your behaviors concerning women,” Zaza tells him sweetly.

“What? I’m good to women,” Jared protests.

“And a lot of them,” Zaza interrupts him dryly. “No, seriously, if any girl asked me for my opinion on dating anyone in our flight, I would tell her to look elsewhere.”

“Excuse me?” Jared looks affronted while Tate watches for my reaction without giving anything away.

Damn, why is he so hard to read?

Jared and Zaza start bickering after that while Tate and I do what we do best, sitting in companionable silence.

After lunch, I join the other runners in geography since no duties or patrols are planned.

We have been handed little squares of a map. Apparently, they represent the average overview we will have from a bird’s back at a comfortable travel height. We are in teams of three—I partnered with Calix and Mariel—and are now supposed to locate the areas on a bigger map.

“That could be anywhere.” I turn the square in my hand and squint at it from a different angle. “If I ever lose the rest of you, I might as well land and wait for you to find me,” I mutter.

“Oh no, you’ll be fine. Let me see.” Mariel takes the square from me. “Oh, that is over at the eastern border, see, the way these villages are placed is very distinct.” She points it out for me, and I nod, but as soon as she takes it over to the map, I can’t remember their placement. I hate memorizing, mainly because I suck at it.

Looking at Calix, who gazes quizzically at the square in his hand, turning it this way and that, makes me feel a little better.

I pick up the next one, but that doesn’t look any better. I should have spent more time looking at the maps instead of playing with my father’s figures placed on top of them. I smile at the memories flooding my mind.

My five-year-old self, curled up in my father’s lap, enjoying the way his rumbling voice vibrated next to my ear, the voices around me a comforting buzz in the background while my eyes get heavier and heavier… Ben and I sitting beneath the big table in my father’s study playing out epic battles while deep voices talk above us…and our teacher, Mr.Tennet, complaining because I played outside instead of studying like I was supposed to.

Yeah, it’s safe to say I did not spend much time looking at the maps I was always surrounded with.

“Oh, come on, both of you. It isn’t harder than doing a puzzle,” Mariel chides, shaking her head at us.

“I just don’t see the point,” Calix complains. “First, our birds will probably be better at it than we are, and second, landscapes look completely different from these boring signs on a dull background.”

I nod enthusiastically, and Mariel snatches up the rest of the squares, placing them on the map in quick succession, muttering to herself about being surrounded by simpletons.

The others have flight classes after that, and I go back to our room, distracting myself by finishing the letters I’ll hand Sloan tonight, trying very hard not to think of the rest of my squadron having fun in the air right now.

I’m finishing the last one when my flight gets back.

“Hey Gray, you up for a game of cards tonight?” Calix appears at the end of my bed, and I suppress the impulse to hide the letter I just put into its envelope.

Relax. You’re just writing your family. Nothing wrong with that.

“Are you alright?” Calix asks, eyeing me carefully. Damn, I hate lying to him. Maybe I could tell him about meeting Sloan tonight?

Godwin leans down from his bed above mine, reminding me this isn’t the place for a heart-to-heart.

“I’m in. When are you meeting up?” Godwin says.

Calix replies, but his eyes are still on me, waiting for my answer.

“I’m fine,” I say. “I’ll have to skip tonight, though. I have to catch up on studying.” Which isn’t a lie. I still have to memorize the map for geography and go over Mariel’s notes from yesterday. So I will sit down and study until everyone is otherwise occupied, then sneak out.

“If you say so.” Calix is still looking at me like he knows something is up, then turns to Godwin and they continue talking while we head to dinner.

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