Page 36 of The Seascape Between Us

I was desperate. When I suggested you transferring schools would be a mistake, you had no interest in the concerns I’d raised. You were so fixated on Daniel, so I told you I saw himwith that friend of his, implied I feared there was more than friendship between them.

He meant Ryan. Fucking Ryan, who even from his grave was still haunting me and Daniel, ready to rip whatever was happening between us apart like tissue paper.

You believed me, and you ended things with Daniel and returned to school just like I’d hoped. I convinced myself that I did the right thing, telling you. However, the shame and guilt I felt inside me, growing stronger with every passing year, tells me the opposite.

I lied to you that day. I never saw Daniel and his friend together doing anything that implied they were anything other than friends.

What!? My stomach dropped to my feet as if the floor had given out from under me, everything inside me turning cold despite the sticky, hot air in the attic. I had to have read that wrong. He’dlied? About Daniel and Ryan? That couldn’t be right. I’dseenthem together, Ryan’s arm around Daniel, Daniel’s head resting on his shoulder.

I’m writing to tell you how sorry I am, how much I regret what I’ve done. Not only did I lie to you, but with such a flimsy lie, I had to keep you from coming back to Oceanwind Square. One conversation with Daniel and you would have known the truth.

No matter how much I regretted what I did, no matter how many times Sean tried to convince me to tell you the truth, I was sure I had done the right thing even if it cost me my relationship with you. Of course, I was wrong. I was wrong to meddle in your relationship. Wrong to try to control your future. I was wrong about Daniel. I misjudged him. He’s one of the best men I’ve ever known.

I was wrong about so many things, and I am so sorry. I understand if you can’t forgive me, but I hope we could at leastspeak to each other again. Know that when and if you are ready, I will be here for you.

Love,

Dad

I closed my eyes and clenched my hand into a fist, crumpling the letter.He'd lied to me.Not only lied to me, but cut me out of his life just to protect that lie.

“Fuck!” The word exploded from my mouth, sounding even louder in the quiet stillness of the attic.

I opened my eyes and looked down at the date at the top of the letter. Nine years ago. He’d written this nine years ago, around the same time he’d bought into the hotel. Was that why he did it? Had he felt guilty for what he’d done, slandering Daniel to me?

Finn had told me one of the college students had found the letter under a bookcase in the study. Had my father opted not to send the letter and, after a time, it had been swept away under the shelves, forgotten? Or had he not realized the letter had fallen under the bookcase? Had he believed he’d sent it, reached out and offered an olive branch only for me to ignore his attempt to make peace?

My chest tightened, but I did my best to ignore the sensation. After all, he’d been the one to lie, the one who pushed me away to keep that lie from ever coming to light, and he’d chosen to put his apology in a handwritten letter rather than picking up the phone or sending an email like any normal person would. None of those things were my fault.

Shit.I dragged my free hand roughly through my hair. All these years, I’d been sure Daniel had been seeing Ryan behind my back, and my father had lied. But IsawDaniel and Ryan together. Ryan, who had married someone who wasn’t Daniel.

Had I been wrong all these years? What had really happened between Daniel and Ryan that summer? I didn’t know, but I was going to find out.

Chapter Fourteen

Daniel

Iwoke with a start, as if something had jerked me awake, though now that I was up, I couldn't say what. I blinked in the low light, taking in the unfamiliar room.

Through the window facing me, the sky was dark, the room dim, except for the soft glow from the lamp on the side table next to me.

For a split second, I forgot where I was and why, then memories flooded over me like a wave. The vanity collapsing under me when I’d tried to lean back against it. A trip to the ER for stitches. Oliver Mackenzie’s house. Grey and the best damn blow job I’d had in years.

Warmth spread through me like melted honey, leaving my limbs heavy. Grinning to myself, I rolled onto my back and stretched. Turning my head slightly, my gaze locked with Grey’s. He sat on the edge of the bed and staring down at me intently. A deep line grooved the skin between his brows. His dark, wavyhair stood out at weird angles as if he’s been repeatedly running his fingers through it.

Unease slithered through me, chasing away that warm sense of contentment. Shit, maybe he was regretting what we’d done.

“Have you been sitting there watching me sleep this whole time? Because that’s pretty weird,” I teased, hoping that the intensity in Grey’s stare would let up a little. That he might crack a smile.

No such luck. If anything, his frown deepened.

“What’s wrong?”

“I need to ask you something.”

Apprehension tickled up my spine, and I sat up holding the blankets to my waist—which probably was unnecessary given everything we’d done a few hours ago, but this looked like the sort of conversation I should be having while wearing pants. If only I had any idea where they were. “Okay.”

“Back when I was here before, were you and Ryan seeing each other while we were seeing each other?”

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