Page 20 of The Seascape Between Us

“Yeah, I guess,” I said, hating the way my voice scratched like I hadn’t used it in years. I don’t know what I’d expected him to say, but I probably shouldn’t have been surprised by the glib remark. For seventeen years, I hadn’t meant anything to him. I don’t know why I believed that might have changed just because we jerked each other off just now.

“Um… I should probably clean up,” I told him, then hurried into his bathroom and closed the door. The fixture above the mirror buzzed softly when I flicked on the light. I washed my hands at the sink and caught sight of myself in the mirror before leaving the bathroom. My hair was a mess, my skin still flushed,lips swollen from kissing. If anyone saw me, they’d have known exactly what we’d been doing.

When I emerged from the bathroom, Grey had his back to me. He was looking out through the window at the ocean. At the sound of the bathroom door, he turned, his gaze meeting mine. Somehow, his hair looked even messier than mine, over-long waves standing out at weird angles. His lips looked as pink and swollen as my own, and I had to hold myself back from the urge to kiss him again.

“I… uh… Should probably grab a shower,” I told him, edging my way to the door.

His throat jumped, and he nodded. “Me too.”

“About the hotel, I’ll meet you in my office first thing tomorrow. We can go over everything then.”

“Absolutely.” Grey nodded, and I wished I could read his expression more easily to get an idea of what was going through his head. Was he glad we did this? Did he regret it? Or was he just looking for a way to pass the time like he had been seventeen years ago?

After muttering an awkward goodbye, I left Grey’s room and hurried to my own at the end of the walkway. Once alone with the door closed behind me, I dragged my fingers through my hair and squeezed my eyes shut. What the hell had I just done? As if the situation between Grey and me wasn’t tense and awkward enough, why not add making out and jerking each other off into the mix?

With a heavy sigh, I peeled off my clothes. They dropped to the floor before I climbed into the shower. But instead of getting ready for bed or even just flaking out on the sofa, I got dressed again instead.

I was wound too tight to sleep, or even relax, for that matter. Instead, I slipped out of my room and made my way to The Dunes.

The only bar in The Square, The Dunes was busy for a Thursday night. Not surprising. The bar had a steady clientele from the university, especially queer students, and with the semester coming to a close, most of those students were looking to blow off steam.

I threaded my way through the crowded tables to the bar near the back, by the small square dance floor, and wriggled my way between bodies pressed close to order drinks. The steady beat of the music thudded through my body, and the air was heavy with the smells of sweat and alcohol.

Brody, the bar’s owner, looked up and nodded when he saw me. He’d been my closest friend for a long time, and I was his, and after playing the role of sounding board and kicker-in-the-ass when he and his boyfriend, Jett, had been working through their shit when getting together, I figured he owed me now.

“What’s up?” he asked, setting a beer in front of me. “You look twitchy.”

“Just made out with my ex,” I told him. No point in dancing around it. This was what I’d come to talk to him about.

Brody frowned. “What ex?”

“You don’t know him. We were together before you moved here.”

He shoved his long hair back from his face and eyed me speculatively. “Is itthatex?”

I frowned. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Ryan mentioned something about you being with some guy when you were younger, and he really messed you up when he left.”

I hated to think about what conversation they’d had that involved my past love life. “Why would you assume it’s him?”

“Have you even dated anyone else long enough to call them an ex?”

Fair question, I thought with a sigh. With everything going on at the hotel, I didn’t have a whole lot of time for dating. I wasn’t a saint. There’d been a few guys since Grey, but no one serious. The hotel kept me too busy to pay much attention to my love life, or lack thereof.

“Yeah, it’s him,” I said.

“So, who is he? Where is he?” Brody continued to serve drinks while we talked.

“I left him back at the hotel after we after we…” I shrugged.

“Does he know you left? He doesn’t think you’re in the bathroom or something, and he’s just waiting for you to come out? God, you didn’t wait for him to fall asleep, then sneak out, did you?”

“No, nothing like that. I just told him I needed to grab a shower, which I did, then I came here.”

“So, whyareyou here instead of back at the hotel, making out with your ex-boyfriend?”

“I think I made a huge mistake.”

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